Ahoooo!

The night of the full moon

Your friends are joking around, laughing, but you're not.  You're nervous, with sweaty palms.  Your throat is as dry as a bone.  You try to smile and you wave goodbye to your friends.  All you can do is hope that they don't follow you after you leave.  At first you walk away from them, until you know they're not able to see you anymore.  Then you pace quickens to a jog.  Yet now it has turned into a dead sprint.  Your heart is pounding in your chest, your breath huffing.  Puffs of breath turn into clouds in the chilly winter air.  The little clouds leaving your mouth as you pant, trying to catch your breath as you continue to run.

Where are you going?

Anywhere, it doesn't matter as long as you're far away.

Away from them

Away from prying eyes.

Those judgemental, hateful eyes that you've seen so many times.  It would be just to painful to see them again.

What are you running away from?

Truthfully you're running away from yourself, your nightmares, your fears...

Drip

Tears start to gather and fall from your eyes.  The tears start as only a few but begin to flow like a river.  They stream down, not stopping.  Your tears hold so many meanings.  No one would ever understand.  They could never understand they pain, or how you suffer every day.

Yet it leaves you to wonder, how long until they figure it out?

How long until they find out your secret?

The tears, how long until they stop?

You stop running and just stand there, amongst the trees, the snow and dirt forest floor, and frost bitten trees.  Looking up you watch the sky, seeing the million of pin prick like stars, and the moon. 

The full moon...

The world you see changes.  Everything does but it isn't the world that has changed.

It's you.

You have changed.

Rustling branches and bushes catch your attention as you lift your nose to sniff the air.  You lower yourself into a crouch and bare your fangs as you see them step out into the open.  They are calling out your name.

You recognize them, know who they are but a growl as loud as rumbling thunder rips through your chest and escapes your razor sharp teeth.

Their eyes find you and their faces become fearful.  Their eyes are wide, their breath has halted, and their mouths are agape.  Your eyes rove over their stiff and tense bodies.

A part of you knows who they are and that part of you fears what will happen next.

Your body moves foreward, stalking them as all that part of you can do is watch.  It's helpless, unable to do anything.

'No... 

This can't be happening

No!

Make it stop!'

Your mind screams out as it is forced to watch the onslaught.

Their screams pierce through the cold night air as claws and fangs slash and tear through soft flesh.

Blood..

Their blood has splattered everywhere.  It's covering the trees and drowning out the once white and snow covered ground.

'No!  Please let it end!'

Your mind begs, trying to block out the images.

And it does, it all ends.

You down at what is left of the people you called friends, of the friends you once knew.  Their faces that once smiled so readily at you, and laughing with you, some times at you, are now covered in cuts and gashes.

Those times had been fun, but they're gone...

Their faces are now frozen in fear.  Their eyes are glassy and wide as they look into the night sky, seeing nothing.  Their blood is spilling from the wounds covering their bodies, wounds that you gave them.

As you hang your head you see their blood covering your paws.  It covers your jaws, dripping from your fangs.  Pieces of flesh are trapped between your claws, stuck in your fur.

It all makes you feel sick.

You can't stand it, that sight anymore and turn your head away, averting your eyes.

You did this...

They were your friends!

How could you?

You grind your teeth as you guilt screams at you, throwing your head to the sky.  You howl your pain, your sorrow...

Run

A voice whispers to you and you run away from them, from what you did.  No one will find out what you did, that you are guilty of killing them but you will.

You will know

And it will haunt you for the rest of your life.

Why did they follow you?

You can't help but wonder as you run through the moonlit forest.  They were leaving!  They were going home, safe and away from you.  If they had stayed there...

If they hadn't...

If they hadn't seen, seen your nervousness

Your fear, they wouldn't have followed you.  They wouldn't have wandered into those dark woods...

Into that dangerous forest...

This all could have been avoided.  This wouldn't have happened and you wouldn't have lost control, done what you did...

They would have been...

They would...

They would still be...

You can barely even think of the words without the guilt choking you, stabbing at you, breaking you...

Yet you swallow it down.

They would still be alive...

If only you didn't exist.