Agony | Teen Ink

Agony

April 18, 2016
By Anonymous

A single spotlight shines upon a single bed at center stage.  Sheets and a comforter of blues and purples adorn the bed.  A sixteen year old girl named Rayna sits atop, staring intensely at her phone, when suddenly she looks up to the audience with a saddened and pained expression on her face as she begins to speak,
“How pathetic.  Pathetic of me and pathetic of you.  No, I feel pathetic for you.”  (Throws phone down on bed) “What does it take to be good enough?  Good enough for someone else, for something, for yourself.  I thought I was good enough for you.  That’s what you always told me.”  (Mimics boy’s voice) “Rayna, my love, I could never find another who understands me as much as you do.  You are the sun to my moon.  The light to my day.  (Pause) I could never love anyone else, like I love you.”  (Pause and scoff)  “Bullshit.”  (A dark figure makes its way onto the stage, just barely visible)  You never loved me.  (The figure speaks.  A soft, gentle voice.  Yet eerie and dark)
‘He couldn’t.  No matter how hard he could have tried.’  (The girl looks around surprised by the voice)
“T-that’s not true.  He couldn’t love me because he didn’t care about me.  (Picks back up phone and looks at screen) Just like he didn’t care that I would be hurt when I found out what he did.”
‘Oh no he cared.’ (The figure moves closer into the light, but the girl still cannot see them) ‘He cared about you so much.  Loved you so much.  But he reached his limit, as everyone does.  (Voice slowly starts to raise with each sentence) You were the reason he did what he did.  It is you who is at fault.  It was and always is your fault.  You are the one who betrayed him!’
“No!”  (The phone falls from the girl’s hands as she starts breathing heavily.  Frantically looking around, trying to find the source of the noise.  She grabs her head with her hands on each side) “I-I-I know I have some issues, but I’m working them out.  I’m fixing them.  He-he said that (pause) that they wouldn’t be a problem.  (Softens voice) That he’d always be there for me.  He’d help me get through this.”  (Girl gets up from bed and starts pacing in front of it.  Up and down, left and right.  Frantic)  “No, no, no, no, this isn’t your fault.  This isn’t my fault.  I am not to blame.  I didn’t do anything to deserve being cheated on.  It is he who is at fault.  I did nothing wrong.  I shouldn’t feel bad about myself, he should feel bad for what he’s done.”  (Stops frantically pacing and faces audience at center stage)  “I am not to blame.  I didn’t deserve this.” 
(The figure laughs manically and the girl whips her body around searching for the voice.  The figure moves directly beside the girl, but the girl still cannot see the figure) ‘You honestly believe that?’ (Said in a mocking voice)  ‘Ha!  You believe, that you had nothing to do with this?  That you didn’t cause this?’ (Voice slowly raises) ‘You’re the entire reason this happened!  The entire reason he left you!  It is because of you that you will remain lonely.’ (Voice softens but keeps the spite with each word)  ‘Forever, and ever, and ever.’ 
“N-no.”  (The girl grabs her head with her hands again and falls to her knees shutting her eyes tight)  “Y-you’re lying!”  “I didn’t cause this.  This isn’t my fault.  Nothing is my fault.  I’m not to blame, I’m not to blame, I’m not to blame.” (Girl says as if more trying to convince herself than anyone else.  The figure comes and kneels by her side, facing only the girl)
‘Oh sweet, Rayna.  You’ve become quite strong.  Quite persistent, I applaud your efforts’ (claps slowly in mockery) ‘You’ve actually made me work a bit’ (laughs as if heard a funny joke)  ‘But it won’t last.  You won’t last.  You simply don’t have the strength to overpower me.  This little game has been fun to play, but I’m getting bored now.  You can’t defeat me.  For (says with a pause after each word) I….Am….A….Part….Of….You!’ (Laughs)
(Girl looks up and meets the figure face-to-face for the first time)  (Stuttering) “N-no.  N-n-no, you c-can’t be.”  (Voice slowly raises)  “You d-don’t kn-know me.  You don’t know anything about me!” (Yells)  “Get out of my mind!”
(Figure yells back) ‘I AM your mind!  I am what’s inside your head, buried deep down inside of you.  You stupid, pathetic little girl.  (Says in a laughing tone)  You really think you can stop me?  Are you honestly so delirious as to believe you can defeat your own mind.  Your own self?’
(Girl looks back down, tears staining her eyes) “I-I- I know I can.  I beat you once before, o-o-or at least suppressed your power over me.  I can do it again.  I will defeat you, y-you demon!  You monster!”
(Figure gets up from beside the girl and moves to kneel behind her, places hands on girl’s shoulders)  ‘If you really want to defeat me, Rayna go ahead and try.  I’m a lot harder to repress the second time around.’ (Slowly starts hunching over girl, whispering in her ear)  (Voice is low and soft) ‘I am everything, anything and nothing, all at the same time.  I am in your head, in your mind, in your brain, dictating everything you think, everything you feel, everything you do.  How do you plan to stop me when control you Rayna.’ 
(Girl struggles to get the figure off of her, but the figure holds on tight not allowing it to be removed from the girl)  (As she struggles she says), “You don’t control me.  I control me.  You are nothing.  Nothing to me and nothing in this world.  Get away and leave me alone!”
(Figure laughs while still holding onto the girl) ‘You see that’s the best part.  I can’t be separated from you.  I will always be with you.  Forever and ever.  Just me and you Rayna.  I am a part of you, and you are a part of me.  We are separate, yet equal.  Different, and yet the same.  I am the only one who will be with you forever, Rayna.  The only one you have to trust.’ (Says in a slow gentle voice) ‘You know me, and I know you.  We both know that you can’t fight me off again, (pause) and we know that you truly, never really wanted to either. (pause) Right?  (The girl slowly shakes her head, nodding in agreement) Because I am all you have.  I will save you from this agony.  From this pain and torment.  You are safe now.  Here (Pause) with me.’
The girl slowly bends her head down forward as the dark figure wraps itself around the girl.  The scene ends and the spotlight slowly fades, leaving the stage and the actors in complete blackness and darkness. 


The author's comments:

It tells the tale of a girl's struggle with depression and self-doubt


Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.