The Basement | Teen Ink

The Basement

March 8, 2009
By Chloe Barrera BRONZE, Lake Oswego, Oregon
Chloe Barrera BRONZE, Lake Oswego, Oregon
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Panic struck her. Her eyes grew wide with fear as tears of pain rolled down her cheeks. One foot after another, she ran, chasing pavement for her life. She needed to get home; she needed to get to safety. Her ears felt plugged up. The dim light on the street faded into sheer darkness. Hours passed before she awoke with confusion and dread. No light was found except for a dull lit corner of the room. A voice from another corner whispered, “You shouldn’t fall Annette. You could get hurt that way.”

She recognized the voice as soon as the words flowed from his mouth. Crystallized beads ran down her gentle face. “Why me?” She cried as she tried to find the body that once knew her rather well. As she struggled to rise she was instantaneously pulled back down. Snakes of thread made her as still as a statue.

“You should think about your actions next time,” he said with a devious smile. Screams that could cause an avalanche echoed from the basement. As the night slowing faded into morning the man carried out a large bag to the corner of the street. He was the last one to see her golden blond hair, sparking blue eyes, and her fragile face.


Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2 comments.


Meli14 BRONZE said...
on Nov. 24 2010 at 1:39 am
Meli14 BRONZE, Othello, Washington
4 articles 0 photos 50 comments

Favorite Quote:
"god is love, and love is real"

I Am Free Read please!Rate thanks(:

LastChapter said...
on Jul. 13 2010 at 2:44 pm
LastChapter, Hempstead, New York
0 articles 0 photos 215 comments

Favorite Quote:
(couldn't think of anything better at the time) "Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."-Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.

very descriptive wording. but you didn't let the readers get to know the characters well enough. it wasn't scary for US because we didn't know the who/what/why/how. maybe adding more of a background could give us more reason to be scared ourselves instead of just scared for the character.