Feedback on "A Mountain of Lies" | Teen Ink

Feedback on "A Mountain of Lies" MAG

March 5, 2015
By sophiea1025 PLATINUM, New York City, New York
sophiea1025 PLATINUM, New York City, New York
21 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Say what you mean and mean what you say because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter." Dr. Seuss


The poem “A Mountain of Lies” by Zoe W. is poignant, thought-provoking, and clever. Zoe uses an extended metaphor to compare a growing pile of pebbles to the heaping mass of expectations and lies placed upon her shoulders as she matures. Starting from age seven, the pile grows and grows, finally collapsing at age 15.

Beautiful, descriptive language is used to convey Zoe’s message. The contrast is apparent as the years pass by. An example is, “When I was seven years old,/I dropped a pebble on a polished floor …. So when I was fifteen,/my mountain tumbled down. Years of intricate planning and design/cascaded into nothing/before my eyes.” Many teens feel peer pressure and expectations weigh down on them, as well as stereotypes and social norms. Zoe skillfully captures this issue. Well done!



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