Stop Complaing: A Guide to Overcoming Hardships | Teen Ink

Stop Complaing: A Guide to Overcoming Hardships

January 15, 2013
By nikiiiZ GOLD, Chicago, Illinois
nikiiiZ GOLD, Chicago, Illinois
12 articles 0 photos 6 comments

A contagious plague.
Different sizes, same significance.

You failed your English final.
Your best friend has ignored you for days.
Someone stole your iPod and all your money.
Your parents are divorced.
Your baby was stillborn.

The list goes on just as life goes on.

Or does it?

That English final you failed? That F brought your grade down to a C, and now you didn't make the honor roll.
Your "best friend?" She is now your worst nightmare.
That money? Who knows how long you'll have to work to restore that.
Your parents? Their fighting drives you mad, and you can't be happy unless there is silence, which is rare.
That baby? It won't get to enjoy life like you did.

Sound familiar? Sure enough, each and every one of you out there has experienced one or more of these challenges. And I'm positive you've rehearsed these complaints, as well.

Why do we complain about the things we sometimes cannot change? Why do we focus on ourselves rather than the other people who are also affected by the same hardships?

Think about it: How is complaining benefiting you in any way? Who else is benefiting from your complaining?

Now ask yourself these questions: How will taking action help me? How will taking action to try and overcome hardships help other people?

Really, this is common sense. But this sixth sense is often blurred by our need to feel sorry for ourselves.

So, yes, you failed your English test. Come next test, you are going to study your butt off. You are going to take notes in class, ask questions, and study profusely. There is no doubt that you'll ace this one.

Your best friend is ignoring you? Instead of thinking why, you'll ask her why. You'll let her speak and you won't deny anything. When she is finished, you will speak nicely, and possibly apologize (depending on the circumstance). Old times will return and everything will be back to normal.

Your money and iPod? You'll earn the money all back. You'll feel determined to so that you can buy that new iPod. Meanwhile, you'll have to turn to other means for entertainment, and maybe discover a new hobby you wouldn't have discovered otherwise.

Your parents are divorced. You are going to talk to both of them (perhaps separately) about their behavior and how it is affecting you. And if that doesn't work, you have other people that care about you that you can turn to.

The baby. You will meet that child when you go to meet your Savior. Meanwhile, you will try again and be blessed with another baby that will make you appreciate the experience that much more.

I didn't say these thing would be easy; that is why they are called hardships. The best things in life don't come free and easy; you must work for those things. And with the right state of mind and a little support, you will achieve those things, and maybe even more.

Hardships drive along a two-way street. Remember, when you are complaining about having to stay in on a Friday to babysit, there is someone out there who is dirt poor and dreaming of a babysitting job.

When you go to face your hardships, obviously you want the support of a few other people. You cannot expect this support to simply fall out of the sky, however. You must also be there for your family, friends, etc. When you give, you will receive.

As hard as it is to hold back a complaint, whether it be about something big or small, this action will benefit you in the future. You will find that you feel much happier once you eliminate that negativity from your life. You will also grow to truly appreciate what you already have. Like I said, though, it's not going to be easy. But if you want to see change and restore order to your life, you must make an effort.

The author's comments:
I must admit I am guilty of being a serial complainer. However, in the midst of finals and right after my recovery from both a broken finger and mono, one person's struggle came about and completely changed my outlook. My best friend's oldest sister was hit by a car and has been fighting for her life for over a week. I realize that my life could be so much worse, prompting me to stop complaining and start doing something with my life.

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