Being a sophomore in high school, I have had to put serious thought into what I would like to do with my life. I am pressured to know what I am interested in as a career so that I can take classes to best prepare me for it. From the time I was a kid, up until now, I have been asked the same question repeatedly: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I understand the importance in exploring career choices from a young age, but I personally hate this question, at least the way that it is asked.

By asking this question, adults are looking for answers career-related, which I believe is absurd. Children shouldn’t be forced to think that all they can “be” when they grow up is merely an employee. Although the idea of a successful future career-wise is important, it is not the most important. So while thinking about what really matters to me in life, and what I value, I decided to answer this question in a completely different way.

When I grow up I want to be happy, regardless of the money I have in the bank account. I grew up in a family fortunate enough to have both food on the table each night and a vacation nearly every summer. I was also fortunate enough to grow up in a family that couldn’t spend money aimlessly. Through this, I got the opportunity to decide what is really important to me, and I realized that being happy and holding close relationships with both family and friends, are what matter most.

When I grow up I want to make a difference. No matter how small the difference may be, I simply want to make one. I would like to invest some of my time volunteering at homeless shelters or donating to charity. I strive to brighten a stranger’s mood every day by giving a sincere compliment. I want to teach, aid, and advise people regardless if my job requires me to do so.

When I grow up I want to have a loving family. I want to teach my children right from wrong, and help mold them into the best children they have the potential to be. I want to spend time with my family and never let any job come in between us. I want to have game nights. You know, those ones where you spend hours upon hours playing an assortment of board games and card games until your stomach aches from laughing hysterically. The kind where it’s way past your kid’s bedtime but you don’t make the slightest fuss because the bond being created is too important. I want to hold family dinners, where everyone helps to make some part of the meal, ensuring that each person is just important in the end result.

When I grow up, I want to find love. I want to find a man to spend the rest of my life with, and make a promise to help him love life. I want to experience the life-changing firsts: the first eye contact, the first moment love is expressed, the first time it is known that this is for the long haul, and the first wedding. Sometimes, I have a long day where nothing seems to go right. But when I get home, I see the shiny black nose of my golden retriever using all of its strength to nudge the door open. Why? Just so she can see me. Her breaths quicken, her tail wags vigorously, and her lip quivers ever so slightly. She begins to whimper because she is so excited. All of this, just for me coming home. And in that moment, when I feel her blanket of love wrap around me, I forget about everything else going on in the world and simply smile. When I grow up, I want to have the ability to give someone that feeling.

You may say all of this is nonsense, and that I’ll never get payed for any of this so it’s simply me being hopeful, but I know I’m going to make it happen. I once watched a Ted talk done by Shawn Achor relating happiness and success. He explained that the formula for happiness in most of society is that if you are more successful, then you will be happy. The problem with this formula is that whenever you reach a new goal, your brain redefines success. If you get good grades, you then need to get better ones. So in reality, you will never reach happiness, because it is impossible to reach a final success. But, if we making being happy a priority first, then we will be more successful. The hormone dopamine that is released when you are happy has two functions: to make you happy and to turn on all learning centers in your brain. This, in turn, will make you more creative, more intelligent, and more efficient in your work. This research alone really inspires me. It is frustrating to know that society makes money and success more important than happiness and emotional health, which is why the things I strive most to be, have nothing to do with money.

From now on, when I am asked what I want to be when I grow up, and I reply with something unexpected, there’s no need to consider it a ridiculous answer. Because in the long run, being happy will provide more success than any “perfect” job could.