When my parents found out I was a girl, my father wept and my mother was overjoyed. 

My father knew that any daughter my mother raised would be the challenge of a lifetime. My mother is strong and defiant. She is chaotic like a thunderstorm, and beautiful like the sky afterward. A force to be reckoned with, and he knew she would raise me to be the same. 

There is a box in my basement filled to the brim with baby name books. My mother would purchase each book from the Barnes and Noble at the mall nearby. She would sit in the food court with her favorite pregnancy craving, an Auntie Ann’s pretzel. She’d scan the pages for hours on end, circling her favorites, and crossing out names of past students who left a sour taste in her mouth. Dog eared pages, stained with ink smears, highlighted potential winners.

Eventually, she would pass the book on to my father. His approvals and disapprovals in thick black Sharpie starkly contrasted my mother’s gentle pink pen strokes. Overpowering marks make you think he had the final say—but that wasn’t the case. 

The names couldn’t be too popular, but not too abstract. They couldn’t be too symbolic, but still needed meaning. Not too short, but not too long. They couldn’t allow for a silly nickname. This process went on for months, and eventually they narrowed the list down.

The names on their short list began to show flaws. Chloe was too juvenile, Jackie was too spunky. Sammie was too plain, and Rose was too simple. After hours in labor, my mother became impatient when she looked over at her nameless child. 

A nurse walked into the room, and introduced herself as Paige. My father’s face lit up. He rummaged through the bags to find one of their many baby name books. He flipped through the book, and showed it to my mother. “Beautiful, young girl”, my father said. In absolute admiration of their new baby girl, the definition was a perfect fit. 

Paige 's simplicity radiates grace, and it’s short, striking pronunciation reveals strength and confidence. French in origin, femenine in sound. They brought me home from the hospital and into a perfectly painted pink nursery, where I would sleep through the night, every night. I was a tiny and quiet baby, a delicate china doll. Until I wasn’t.

 My mother’s spirit showed in me early on. I let the world know when I wasn’t happy, asserting myself through wails and screams.  Forever an advocate for myself. I was speaking in full sentences by the age of two, and I never looked back.  I was a challenger, always pushing the limits of what I could get away with, and questioning authority. 

Nevertheless, the grace and poise radiating through my name has consistently served me well. I convey my ideas with respect and confidence. I am passionate whilst not being overbearing. I am a dreamer with plans and reasoning. I have learned that poise and grace will take me far in accomplishing my goals, and my mother’s spirit will fuel me farther. 

Paige.