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Betrayal
“Why would you do this to a person who only gave you love and loyalty!!!” , I yelled.
I yelled at the person I loved and cared about. I felt so empty and just had a little bit of me to let my emotions out on them. I gave them everything and also gave them all to the best of my ability.
July 11th , the day after my birthday around 3 am, I was going through … we’re going to call this person R. I went through R phone because me and R were in a relationship and I felt like R was doing something they weren't supposed to be doing. I had a gut feeling that R was doing something so bad to the point where I didnt even want to even know. R told me I can go through their phone whenever and that's exactly what I did. I woke up around 3 am and Thought to myself , “ If I feel like he is hiding something, I can check right ?” & the thought that came straight back right into me was “YES! YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO LOOK IF YOU FEEL LIKE R IS HIDING SOMETHING!!!”.
I began to start going through R’s phone and started finding out so many things about them. I found out they were making secret accounts for inappropriate websites, and had fake accounts for things such as Instagram, Snapchat, & twitter. I started thinking and shaking and felt sick to my stomach. I was thinking “ how can someone be so okay with doing this to a person? How is this person right in the head ? This person needs help.”. R wakes up and sees me and tries to talk to me. But I yell at R and say, “Why would you do this to a person who only gave you love and loyalty!!!”. R replies, “ I'm sorry”. In my head I was just thinking “ are you sorry for what you did or are you sorry that you got caught?”
I moved on and distanced myself from that PERSON. I learned that never to give someone all your love and loyalty and at a young age and never put your trust into a …. Person you don't know that well.
The feeling of betrayal is the worst feeling you can ever feel in my opinion. My whole life I have always been lied to. I never actually had no one to ever be straight up with me.
This is my favorite mistake & I know there will be many more throughout my life. All I can do is learn and grow from it and move on.
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This piece about me learning to love myself and grow.