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Buchanan Pass
I sat in my seat, sweaty and tired, staring out the window, watching the lush
wilderness I had just spent the last eight days living in, falling deeper into the horizon as we drove away. I thought about the struggles and challenges I had faced and how I overcame them. I rested my head on the seat in front of me, pressing it into the sticky blue pleather. I closed my eyes remembering just the day before.
Step after step, I walked along a rocky mountain trail. I was feeling the grip
of my asthma wrap around my lungs. I felt my breath get shorter with each step. Tears ran down my face as my eyesight blurred in and out like a broken tv screen. The rocky landscape faded into a beige field in my eyes. My heart sank thinking about the big drop to my left. The lingering thought remained in my head, “you will fail” repeating, over and over again. The buzzing sound of cicadas filled the air, but all I could hear was the weezing of my breath and the pounding of my heart. My backpack weighed me down; it felt as if it was full of bricks. My sweaty palms tightly clutched my trekking poles. My sweat was absorbed into the cracks of the cork. Tripping
my way up the path, I solely relied on them to keep my balance. I was stumbling on the rocks and stabbing my trekking pole into the earth to keep me from falling. As I hiked up the switchbacks, I was being careful not to knock the rock so they would not fall on the people below. Pausing for a moment to catch my breath, I could feel the hot gaze of the sun on my skin. I continued walking step after step, breath after breath persevering, because that was the only choice I had.
As I made my way up the mountain, I began to make out ten or so figures
above me on the top of the mountain. One of the other students in my group figured out that this was another group from our school, which gave us all great motivation to go see them. Even though I barely knew the kids in the other group, seeing them made me feel a little sense of normalcy and distracted me from my asthma difficulties. I was determined to get to the top, so I continued hiking. There were beads of sweat dripping down my face and I struggled to breath. Even though I was weezing my way up the last little part of the trail, I did not stop. When we all made it to the top we were greeted with such a warm welcome. When I threw down my pack to rest, I was overcome with a great sense of pride and accomplishment. I had just achieved something I did not think I could do. I had so many doubts going into this trek. I thought I would not get to the top, so to be there felt amazing. I had exceeded the expectations I had set for myself and pushed myself farther than I thought I could go and for that I felt proud.
Pushing through my asthma was not the only accomplishment I achieved. I
found strength in myself to ask for others' help when I needed it. I learned to ask the other people in my group to slow down, despite feeling embarrassed. I also learned how important it was to rely on myself for comfort and feelings of safety, when things were challenging. I know that learning to rely on myself for those things is something I will carry with me for a long time.
Sitting on this bus, only a day after that experience I felt that I found
something important in myself. Persevering through something both mentally and physically challenging, helped me to grow and change for the better. I found myself to be a lot stronger than I had given myself credit for. As I lifted my head from the seat in front of me, peeling my forehead from the sticky plastic, I looked out the window at beige fields of grass. I felt the same sense of pride I had felt on that very mountain. I now have the confidence to know that next year, when I head out on this backpacking trip again,
I know I am strong enough.
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My name is Sierra, I wrote this piece about my experience backpack with my school.