It was a warm summer morning. There was no wind to be found. Sweat was running down my face. I wasn’t sweating because of the heat or any form of exercise. I was sweating because of the news I received moments prior.

I was at Miriam Hospital talking to the doctor about the surgery on my knee the following day. He told me that the surgery itself wasn’t life threating, but the anesthesia was. I was told that my weight had caused severe sleep apnea and there was a chance I wouldn’t wake up from the anesthesia.

I came home from the hospital in tears. I began hitting myself in disgust. I was ashamed of myself. I had never imagined that I could die from my weight. I began doing pushups on the floor next to my bed to lose weight. I knew that the pushups wouldn’t help, but I wanted to feel like I tried before I went to sleep. After I grew tired from the pushups, I laid in my bed wondering. I questioned why I was the one in this positon and not someone else. Why was I the one that had to suffer all the ime and not someone else? I remembered all the times I lost weight exercising and then put it back on. I thought about these things until I fell asleep.

It was 6:00am the following morning and I was getting ready for the surgery. I took a shower and got dressed. I packed a few magazines for after the surgery. I went downstairs and smiled at my mom. She was confused and asked “Why are you smiling?”

I simply replied “I’m happy.”

She replied, “But you were in tears last night”

I told her “I had a dream that gave me hope.”

I dreamt that I was a part of the New York Yankees and we were facing the Minnesota Twins. Before the game, there was a ceremony taking place and it was in my honor. The ceremony was for rehabilitating from an extensive surgery and then continuing to follow my passion. After the ceremony, the game began. When I got up to bat, I woke up. The smile I had that morning in my house and on my way to the hospital was from a dream. The dream gave me hope that everything was going to be fine.

When I arrived at the hospital, I checked in and sat in the lobby waiting for my name to be called. My name was finally called after about half an hour of waiting. The nurse led me to a changing room to put on a hospital gown. After that, I was lead to my bed where I would wait to be taken. After about an hour, I was finally brought to where I would be operated on. The anesthesiologist told me to count down from ten and all of a sudden, I was out. I woke in pure joy. I made it through the surgery. After about two hours of having to sit in the hospital bed, I was finally released. I went home and took a great nap.

The following day I created a creed as to which I live by. I believe it is essential to work out every day for at least thirty minutes. That day I started physical therapy and worked as hard as I could. I couldn’t work out with my legs for about a month due to a leg cast, but it didn’t stop me from doing weights. I was getting into a rhythm and was losing weight. From that day until today, I have lost 40lbs.