Henry Duer walked into the hall and aimed at the coffee machine. You would think that the economics advisor at NCR could enjoy a better cup of coffee, but he could care less. Caffeine was caffeine.

“Mr. Duer! Don’t forget you have a board meeting at 10:00am!”

“Thanks Beth.”

Beth Howard was the best secretary any one could have. Every morning when Henry showed up to work, she had laid out the day’ s scheduled appointments. She always smiled when she saw him and was always there when he needed someone to talk to. Before Henry married, he and Beth had an affair that lasted for almost two years. At the time Henry and Beth were both in sales and it was young love right out of college. Having sex with her once or twice a week is what Henry always looked forward to. But when she told him that she started to date someone, the friends with benefits ended.

Henry wasn’t mad at the time. It was a reality shock that told him that he couldn’t be sleeping with co-workers forever. He began seeing other girls for a year before he came across Maria. She was a immigrant from the Philippines, and was a waitress and the Marriott Hotel. She wasn’t trash though. She earned a degree in Public Relations at UCLA before she moved to Ohio. Henry didn’t really care why she moved. He just enjoyed her. After a few dates and a few nights in bed, they decided that they were going to get married.

It was a very risky move, but did they have to lose? The marriage caused a lot of gossip at the office. It even got worse when Maria was hired as an Advertising Consultant at NCR. They were the poster children of the young, married, and co-workers. Today they weren’t young, and they weren’t the hot couple anymore. The office forgot they were even married for a bit! They didn’t feel old, but there was every indication that they were.

“Henry, are we ever going to have kids?”

“Wouldn’t that make us look older?”

“Oh shut up. Why don’t you want children?”

“I don’t want little balls of sin roaming around her house for twenty some years.”

“But don’t you want to carry on the Duer name? You’re the last one!”

“Maria, I told you not to bring up our first date!”

“Henry, what happened? Ever since-”

“STOP! That is in the past. It’s time-”

“But they’re your family Henry!”

“You don’t know didley s*** Maria! You would never understand!”

“Please tell me Henry. I hate seeing you upset…”

He never told Maria about his childhood. He never told her that he lived in poverty or that he even grew up in Baltimore. She just thought that he was a good ole mid western boy. Maria deserved to know the truth. Her love and companionship has almost lasted ten years, and there were no signs of it ending. “Maria, there are a lot of things I need to tell you…”

“I grew up in a very poor home in Baltimore. My parents both quit working when I was thirteen and was dependent on the state till I graduated from college. During the winters we froze to death, because my dad’s lazy ass wouldn’t work. My mom was so worried about us; she spent five hours a day at the parish praying. That left my siblings and I alone a lot.”

“What? I never knew-”

“Shhhh. Just listen. After my high school graduation I came home to find my dad drunk as a sailor. He kept blabbering on and on till my mom told him to shut up. A fight broke out, and everything turned to hell. They were wrestling on the ground when I walked in and saw my mom’s bloody face sunken in the wooden floor. I ran over to help but I couldn’t hear a pulse. I heard shouting from the basement. I ran downstairs and saw my twin brothers trying to hold my dad down, but he shook them off with ease. I ran down and Larry hit me on the back of the head with a golf club. He thought I was the neighbor that lived across the street. I woke up in the hospital a few hours later. I saw nurses, doctors, and police in my room. Out side the window I saw about five news trucks with reporters outside. It turned out that my brother Dickey and Larry beat my dad close to death. They claim it was self-defense, but I believe they bought up the opportunity to get back at him. They served a few months at a detention center, and my dad got twenty-five years in jail for murder. That summer I move to Ohio and attended University of Dayton. I have never seen them since that night. Apparently my cousins have been in touch with them. Larry lives in Chicago and is at teacher at a catholic school, and Dickey lives in Houston and works for some engineer.” “Oh my god Henry!” Maria embraced him as tears fell off her face. She has never heard such a depressing story in her life.
“I had no idea! Why didn’t you tell me?”
“It’s a thing from the past.”
“Still Henry, if you would have told me-”

“There is nothing you could have done. Why would I want to tell you something so tragic?”

“Because we’re married Henry! Even after I told you how my dad was killed in a car accident, you still didn’t feel like I could handle this?”

“Maria, please, don’t take it that way.”

“Then how am I supposed to take it? I can’t let you live your life that is haunted by the past!”

“Maria, I have no desire to try to fix it. Once broken, always damaged.”

“Henry, you, me, we’re going to fix things.”

That whole weekend Henry vented. He just layed on the couch in their condo, drinking for two days straight. His past has never hurt him this bad since the whole thing happened. Maria was out with her girlfriends Saturday and Sunday. If I were her, I wouldn’t want to be around me either. Heavy 5 o’clock shadow, intoxicated for almost every waking minute, depressed…it’s just a bad time. On Monday morning Maria woke Henry up around 7:00am. “Wake up you drunk! We have to get moving!” Henry stumbled to the bathroom and took a hot shower. He was in there for like twenty minutes till Maria was pounding on the door to hurry up. Thinking that he was going to work, he shaved and brushed his teeth for the first time since Friday. He put in his contacts and dressed up in his usual business attire. He came out of the bedroom and saw Maria dressed in a black blouse and a blue sweater. “What a shitty weekend…” “Shut up Henry. I let you throw yourself a pity party ALL weekend, now it’s time to fix things.” “What do you mean?” “I have two plane tickets to Washington D.C. Your father is in a correctional facility there and-” “What the hell Maria? Why did you-” “I don’t want to hear it Henry! I’m not going to let you live any longer with the pain you have!” “Couldn’t we talk about it before-” “Go get your jacket our flight leaves at 11:00am and it will take us back home at 8:00pm. I already called you in sick for the day, now get your things!” Usually their marriage was always agreement of some sort. But for the first time in ten years, Maria was the boss. Henry was going to complain though. He did never tell her about his troubled past for the whole time he has known her. They were in silence for the whole car ride to the airport, and on the flight to D.C. It wasn’t till on the way to the Washington Correctional Facility till Maria said, “Henry I know you’re pissed off at me, but will you please say something?” Henry didn’t reply. When they checked into the visitor’s lobby, Henry finally said, “Maria I’ll do my best.” They walked down the dimly lit hallway to a room filled with inmates talking to their visitors. They sat down at a table and the warden said, “He’ll be out in a minute.” Then they saw an old man in an orange jumpsuit, in handcuffs, accompanied by two guards walking to them. It was Andrew Duer. His hair was white as snow. He was wearing glasses and had a clean-shaven face. Wrinkles devoured his forehead and he walked with a long stride. “Mr. Duer,” said the guard. “Your son Henry and his wife Maria are hear to visit you.” He stood there in silence. Henry looked up and glared at his father. He hasn’t seen him in almost three decades. He sat down and there they were. A family reunion was about to take place. “Hello Dad.” “You finally chose to visit me.” “I didn’t want to. She made me.” “Whose she?” “My caring, ALIVE wife Maria.” “What the hell do you want?” “Dad, I-” “If you are going to say, ‘I forgive you’ I don’t want to hear it!” “I’m not going to say that.” “If you’re going to say how well you’re doing, I don’t want to hear it.” “I’m not going to say that.” “Then what the hell are you going to say?” Henry gave him a mean glance. His eyeballs fired with rage. All the pain you cause me, all the sleepless nights I’ve had, all the secrets I’ve hid, and this is how you approach me? You f*ing murderer! “Dad. I don’t know what the hell happened that night. Nor do I know what has happened since.” “Well it’s pretty simple. I got drunk, killed your mother, your brother’s almost killed me, and I’ve spent the last twenty eight years behind bars.” “That sounds lovely.” “You and your sarcasm. You know you got that from your grandmother right?” “Well, Dad I’m glad you are here.” Maria sat there in anxiety. This wasn’t going according to plan. In all the dramas she has watched the prison reunions always started with hugs, and ended in kisses. Did she really think this was going to be like that? “Henry, if you have nothing to say, I’ll gladly go back to my cell.” “And do what?” “Pretend that you weren’t there?” “No read, write, do a few pushups, and talk to the guards.” “You know you’re the definition of an asshole right?” “Well that isn’t new.” “Dad, this is the first time I’ve seen your face in years.” “Do I look better?” “No you look like you have been raped by Ja’Marcus and Jeffery in the shower hundreds of times.” Andrew Duer started to crack up, “You’re something you know? Sure I can keep pretending I’m the hard ass prisoner that has no emotions, but I am not going to do that.” “Then what the hell are you going to do? Tears started to fall from Andrew Duer’s face. Henry has never seen that. Andrew took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, and looked at Henry, then looked at Maria. “I remember one night in January when we were trying to keep warm, I went upstairs to see what you were up to. I heard you pray, ‘I hope I’ll never do this to my family’ or something like that. Ever since then, I’ve been nothing but a rotten, drunk. I realize that my time on earth is a waste. I have done nothing but kill mothers, and ruin son’s lives. Dickey and Larry visit me every Christmas and Easter. They always say, ‘Jesus can help you!’ but I just tell them to lay off and get on with their lives. You on the other hand have probably living with that night ever since. Am I right?” “Actually Dad, you are. I have lied to everyone I come into. I tell them that my parents moved to some tropical island and retired.” “HA! Oh how I wish!” “Dad, I don’t know how to say this, but, I…” “What forgive me? You can’t do that! I don’t care what all the priests and pastors say about forgiving your enemies. I completely f*ed up you, and your brother’s lives. And I am deeply sorry Henry. Every morning, I get out of my stiff mattress and hit my self in the face as hard as I can. Can you see my jaw is out of place?” “Dad, I just can’t-” “What say ‘I forgive you’?” “No, not that. I just cant handle seeing my father, my blood, my DNA, locked up. I don’t care anymore that Mom is gone. I don’t care that I’ve thought about that night every day. I just care about the fact that I, we, have wasted our lives.” “Aint that the truth.” “Dad just listen. There is nothing I can do to bring Mom back from the dead, you out of jail, and talk to my brothers again. I don’t know what to say, but the next time I see you, I’ll be ready.” “Well at least you’re honest.” “I’ll see you soon Dad.” The guards took Andrew Duer back to his cell. Henry sat on the table, still in shock. Maria wrapped her arms around him and gave as much comfort that her heart could give. They walked out of the prison, and sat on a bench, and waited for a taxi. “Thanks Maria.” “I’m sorry Henry. I-” “Don’t apologize love. This reconciliation will be a great lesson to teach our kids."