Freshman year had suddenly got a lot harder for me. I took less interest in school and more interest in spending time with all the older girls on the swim team. They knew about all the high school parties and they knew older boys. Maybe getting over Michael wouldn’t be as hard as I had originally thought. My best friends were all that mattered to me. With friends and chocolate ice cream on your side, a girl can get through any tragedy big or small. That only lasted a few days; finally Hayden dragged me with her on a mini-shopping spree.
Hayden leaned over to me and said, “A new wardrobe will make you feel better and new clothes will turn Michael’s head and make him wish he wouldn’t have messed up.”
“Why is your answer shopping when something bad happens?” I had to ask her.
“Because it always makes you feel a little better, admit it!”
I would never give her the satisfaction, but retail therapy is the best kind.

School wasn’t as hard to embrace, and I noticed all the heads that turned in my direction. Was that from the new clothes or did this happen all the time? Maybe I just never noticed before. Classes went well up until March when my granddad passed away. Growing up we was really close, but he had been sick for many years. It is still a shock when someone so close to you passes away. I just knew I wasn’t meant to be happy this year, everything had gone wrong and I didn’t understand any of it! I started caring less and less about school, my grades at that point started showing little by little. An exam here and a quiz there, at first it wasn’t anything but when my grades stayed low my parents knew something was up.
Sophomore year started out no different. When everything in my life goes wrong, I start thinking about Michael again. Now Bo Swift had text me, but why?
When I got home from swim practice at seven, I was exhausted. Mom had made my favorite dinner, chicken parmesan, and I remembered Grey’s Anatomy was starting back up today. I had told Bo I had swim practice and that I would text him later but I always hate texting guys first even if I had told him that I would. I sat at the dinner table and heard my text ringtone go off in my room. I got a huge bite of food and ran to get my phone.
One new text: Bo Swift
“I guess I don’t have to text him first after all” was what I thought. His text said, “How was practice?” I decided to finish my dinner before I got too wrapped up in a conversation with Bo. It took about 5 minutes for me to inhale my food and get seconds. Swimming, you don’t realize, makes you extremely hunger especially when you don’t eat that “stuff” they try to pass as food in school. I finish my dinner, and decide to stay downstairs and lay on the couch to watch my television shows. I grabbed my phone and text Bo back. By eleven o’clock I was so tired and finally had to tell Bo goodnight. We covered all the major topics: family, friends, sports, baseball, and swimming, you name it we talked about it. For the first time in months, I was going to bed with a huge smile on my face.
******
School continued like always, but I never knew Michael and Lauren had history together. All the minor details fell into place. It was at the beginning of December when Kelly came up to me at the beginning of swim practice and told me she had class with them.
“I should have told you this back in September, but Lauren and Michael have a few classes together.”
It was all I needed to know to piece everything together and realize how stupid I must have seemed. So they had classes together, meaning he got to see her everyday, talked to her everyday, more than that and knowing him he flirted with her everyday. She seemed like one to go right along with it and not care that he had a girlfriend.
“Thanks Kelly” was all I said. I was livid.
The rest of swim practice I couldn’t quit thinking about Michael and the text he would receive once I got out of dance. Time had never proceeded any slower than the hour I had left. I thought about all our memories and couldn’t help but wonder if this was the first time this had happened, or if there were others he kept secret.
Rushing out of practice, I had only one thing on my mind. My stomach hurt, I was so nervous. Would he lie? Or would he tell me the truth?
I texted, “Hey, I have a quick question and then I’ll leave you alone.”


















******
The song, “Your Beautiful” blares from my phone at a quarter past six. I hate waking up in the morning; I’m a miserable person to be around. I moan as I roll out of bed, not ready for yet another day at school, but hey at least its Friday. Normally it takes me a solid hour to wash my hair, blow dry, apply make-up, and eat breakfast. My morning routine hasn’t changed in the eight or nine years that I have been getting ready for school by myself. I walk downstairs at 7:20, grab quick bite, and head to pick up Hayden for school.
Considering I am the oldest of our trio, I have to pick up Hayden for school. Victoria’s older brother is a senior so she catches a ride with him everyday. As soon as Hayden climbs into the car, I tell her everything that happened last night.
“So, Bo text me last night when I got home from practice,” I say to her without turning my attention from the road. I could see from the corner of my eye Hayden bouncing around in the passenger seat. If I thought I was excited yesterday about the initial conversation, it doesn’t compare to how happy she is at this moment.
“I just can’t believe it. I can’t believe it. Ashton, He is a senior. Do you realize how many cool points you are going to score just being in his presence!” Leave it to Hayden to be thinking about our popularity at a time like this.
“So, what did he say to you?” she asks. I shake my head as to say, “Nope, not giving any information up” and turn to look at her with a smile. She sinks into the seat and pouts until I give up everything minute of our conversation.
“Your so lucky Ashton, and you completely deserve his attention. Michael doesn’t even know what he is missing.”
Here it comes again, that overwhelming feeling of sadness I get every time I even hear his name. Just like clock work, if only it would just go away; these feelings that rise up inside me.
We pull into the parking lot and pass the long line of cars waiting to drop of their kids; yes this is high school and yet parents still insist on dropping off their freshman children. When I was a freshman I refused to allow my parents to drop me off. I pull into my designated parking spot at the top of the second row. Hayden jumps out of the car first, backpack already around her shoulders as she skips to the back of the car to wait for me to gather my things. I shut the car door, and turn to walk when I see them walking down the aisle towards the building, Michael and Lauren.
I stop dead in my tracks and spin to the side so they won’t see me, but it’s too late. Michael looks up right as I am about to turn. I catch his eyes lingering on me for a split second and then turn to Lauren. Hayden walks around to the side of my car, looks me dead in the eye and said “Ashton, he’s not worth it.” Funny thing, after all that has happened, to me, he is still worth it. We link arms and head inside the building.

















******
I hovered over my phone in anticipation for Michael’s first reply, if he would at all. Maybe it was a mistake to even text him. Our break-up was almost two months ago, what would it even help now?
Within minutes Michael had replied to me, “Yeah what’s up?” Here was my chance to get Michael’s story for myself. I decided to get straight to the point, not waste any of his time.
“I was just wondering if Lauren was the only girl you had cheated on me with?” That sure was painful to type out and even worse was the wait for the response from him.
A few minutes later he had responded with, “Who told you I cheated on you with Lauren?” I just love how boys try to play it cool, like they never do anything wrong.
“A girl who is in a few of the same classes with y’all told me today during swim practice and I just wanted to know if she was the only girl.”
Now, I was just mad not even upset over it anymore. He didn’t have to lie to me anymore; we weren’t even dating anymore. He responded, “Ashton, I don’t know who is feeding you all these lies but I never cheated on you with Lauren or any other girl for that matter.”
What a line of crap. A guy doesn’t up and break-up with a girl for no reason, just to date a girl he met two months ago. I guess there is more to the story then I have heard.




******
I withdraw my arm from Hayden’s when I reach my locker to gather my books for class. I shut my locker door and turn to walk to my first period, and as I soon as I do I slam right into someone. I hurriedly gather my books from the floor and as I get up I see Bo standing right above me. “I’m so sorry, Ashton!” he says. “No, no it’s fine I didn’t see you standing there.”
My heart is racing being so close to him. His shaggy, dark brown hair hanging loosely around his face and his t-shirt that shows just enough of his sculpted upper arms. I may just melt in the middle of the hallway.
“Can I walk you to first period?” he asks.
“Yeah, sure. My class is down the second hallway, where is yours?” I ask as we walk down the first hallway towards Mrs. Daniels class.
“Also down the second hallway, classroom on the end to the right,” he replies to me. I can’t help but notice how close we are walking to each other. As we talk, I feel a light graze on my right arm, or was it just my imagination?
We reach my room and as I turn to tell him good-bye, he reaches out and grabs my arm. “Ashton, I was meaning to ask you what your plans were for tonight?”
I could feel my cheeks begin to grow hot and my palms start to get sweaty. “Hayden got invited to a party tonight at the old Lewis Plantation. She asked me yesterday to go with her.” I could see his face brighten a little bit as he said, “Good I was hoping you were going to come, I was going to ask you to go with me but looks like someone beat me to it. See you there?”
“Yeah, I’ll see you then,” and with that I walked into my first period class.




******
I met up with Hayden after I talked to Michael and told her everything Kelly had said to me at practice. “What do you like Hayden, do you think he is lying about Lauren?” I asked her nervously.
“Even if he isn’t the whole situation is just messed up, he messed up Ashton,” she told me as she twirled her black hair around her fingers.
“Yeah, your right it is messed up,” but I couldn’t help to feel like Michael had been lying to me all along.
I rushed home after talking to Hayden not wanting to miss dinner that my mom had cooked for the family. When we pulled into the driveway, my heart sank in my seat. Michael was sitting on my front porch waiting for me.
I slowly get out of the car, slam the door, and walk slowly in his direction.
“Hey Ashton,” he says with his face looking down at the ground.
“Hey,” I mumble back to him still wondering why he is at my house.
“I wanted to talk to you in person about what you text me about today. I know I should have done this a long time ago, but I never had the courage to face you in person.”
So he wanted to finally talk in person, that was a first. I know I shouldn’t give him the benefit of the doubt, but something inside me was saying that I needed to trust him this time; after all he was my best friend before these last two months happened.
“Then if you never cheated on me, then what happened with Lauren?” I asked him.
“I never talked much about where I lived before I moved here” he started, “and I never thought I would have any reason to until I got to high school and saw Lauren. She was my girlfriend when I was in elementary school, and I thought I would never see her again when I moved.”
I thought I was going to cry hearing his story, but I kept my composure and continued to listen.
“Her dad’s job got transferred at the beginning of freshman year, but she didn’t have my cell number to let me know school, but when I walked into my second period class there she was. I was shocked and excited at the same time. Turns out we had four of our seven classes together. I never meant to hurt you Ashton, that’s why I never told you about Lauren. I’m so sorry that I hurt you the way I did and I hope everything works out for you,” he ended.
By the look on my face, Michael knew how shocked I was. My eyes had grown wide and my mouth was hanging open. I was frozen where I stood and had no idea how to respond back to the story he just hurled at me. The first thing that came to my mind was, “You should probably go now.”
He nodded and started to walk past me. Before he left I said to him, “I hope she makes you as happy as she did three years ago,” and with that he got into the car and left.




******
School is finally out for the weekend. Hayden and I rush to my car so we can go for a shopping run before the big party tonight.
“Which cd do you want to listen to?” I ask Hayden, even though she is already looking through my collection.
“How about this one?” she says as she already puts it into the player. Britney Spear’s newest song “Hold It Against Me” comes blaring over the speakers as we giggle and drive away from the parking lot.
“Will Bo be at the party tonight? If so I hope he brings some cute friends for me!” she yells over to me, giggling the whole time.
“Yeah he told me this morning he was going to be there, actually he asked me to go with him but I said I was already going with some friends,” I replied back to her. I could see her bobbing up and down in her seat as I tell her the news.
“AHHH!!!!! I’m so excited for you Ash, you deserve someone like Bo, he’s good looking, captain of the baseball team, and a senior. Y’all would be perfect for each other.”
That’s what I love about Hayden, she is always happier for me then I am for myself. Most girls get jealous over guys or clothes or whatever, but not Hayden.
We pull into the mall parking lot and wait out front to meet up with Victoria. As soon as she arrives all three of us rush into the mall. Finding the perfect outfit tonight is our top priority, because everyone from our school will be in attendance tonight.
“Victoria, has Ashton told you about who invited her to the party with him tonight?” Hayden asks as we walk into the first store we see.
“No! Ashton who asked you?? Sorry I’ve been so busy with school and practicing so much I haven’t had a chance to talk to y’all much this week,” she replied.
“Come on Ash, tell her who met you at your locker this morning.”
I could feel my face growing hot as I begin to blush, seems like this is a reoccurring event when I even think about Bo, much less talk about him. I reply to Victoria, “Bo.”
Victoria stops walking and spins to face me; eyes wide and mouth open. “ Ashton Davis, what on Earth?? When did you start talking to him?” she asks me.
“He started texting me yesterday during last period. I stayed up and talked to him all last night and then this morning he just appeared at my locker.”
“Well then we have to get to shopping if we are going to find the perfect outfit for you to wear tonight. Bo Swift won’t know what hit him when you show up tonight, and Michael, oh who cares about him.” Victoria says as she grabs my arm and runs through the store.
We look around for ten minutes and all meet up in the middle so we can go to the dressing rooms together. Each of us has found an arm full of clothes to try on. We rush to the back of the store where three small changing rooms are placed side by side. We each try on the garments and finally yell to each other when we are pleased enough to let each other see.
“Alright, you have to tell me what you think,” I tell the girls as I start to open my dressing room door. As I step out, I see both of their faces light up. Hayden runs over to me saying “Ash, that’s the dress. You have to wear it tonight. You look amazing.”
The red dress I was wearing had a high neckline and sleeves barely covering the shoulders, but when you turned around the center of the back was cut out. It hung to the middle of my thigh and accented with my tan skin and dark hair.
Victoria and Hayden each bought dresses, Victoria’s was a black one-shoulder dress and Hayden decided on a hot pink strapless dress that looked amazing with her figure and her complexion.
“Tonight, all three of us are getting dates, you just wait,” Hayden said as we leave the store to get ready for our big night.