I love you. It’s of the most simple yet profoundly powerful statements one person can divulge to another. It implies that one cares unconditionally for another. True love means absolute acceptance and unfailing understanding. True love means that no matter what was to happen, one’s heart is devoted to their life partner in crime. When I was young, my mother explained it to me. She said that you know you’re in love when you think that even if this person were to become a vegetable stuck to a wheelchair for the rest of their life you’d still love them. You’d be willing to take care of them. You’d be willing to feed them, bathe them, change their diapers, and ultimately replace all your desires and dreams to tend to them. It’s a worrisome thought. No one wants to think of the person they care about as the result of a horrible accident, but is it not true?

In today’s society, the phrase I love you is thrown around too easily, without the knowledge of its true power. Even yesterday as I stood in my kitchen, I argued with my ten year old brother as he talked the phone with his “girlfriend of the week” who he professes to be madly in love with. At the age of ten, you don’t even know what love is. When I was ten, I still thought boys had cooties! It worries me that this kind of play is encouraged in children. There is no need for a ten year old to be holding hands with a nine year old at recess or writing love notes in class. Does nobody see a problem with that?

And it doesn’t end there. In the high school, the dangers of unrealistic affections can even be fatal. Boys and girls have killed themselves as well as others as a result of their “undying love.” The misuse of the phrase “I love you” has resulted in the deaths of thousands of high schoolers just because children didn’t realize what they were saying. How much can you truly love someone if it makes you want to kill yourself or others? Does true love kill children?

No. The “love” that young boys and girl proclaim they experience is natural born lust. It’s in every one of us. There comes a point, after all, when everyone realizes world beyond themselves, and with that, the realization that they don’t want to be alone. So they practice the art of dating, just for the experience or just to say “Yeah. I have a girlfriend/boyfriend.” And the thus, lust is born. Granted, there are exceptions. There are those who follow the golden rule and sometimes find love early. My mother, one of the wisest women I’ve ever known, taught me this as well.

“Look at every date like a potential mate.” You have to remember that every time you say you love someone, they could be your last. They could be the one that falls in love with you and expects to be your partner in life. And you don’t want a one sided love. That results in a broken heart, which gets messy. So, I learned from a early age, that if I couldn’t see myself with them forever, if I couldn’t see myself taking care of them, if I didn’t see a little piece of our future at all, then there was a problem.

Now, I’m not saying that the very minute you start to date someone, you should start trying to see your future with them. No. Don’t do that. Don’t start dating a guy/girl and start thinking about your house in the suburbs with two kids and a dog. No. That’s kind of scary. But love doesn’t happen in a day and it isn’t something we should practice with. Friendship is a step and necessity to true love. You should friends before you start raining down with your “undying love.” You should really know the person your dating. And whether dating young, for fun, or seriously, you have to remember that there is another person in this relationship and their heart and feelings are now involved. When you’re able to comprehend that there’s another person with feelings and emotions, when you can see beyond yourself, then you’re ready to start dating.

And only after that, should you consider a phrase like I love you.

And sorry to disappoint, but the age of love isn’t at ten years old. Sorry little Romeos.