The Effects of a Divorce | Teen Ink

The Effects of a Divorce

February 10, 2009
By Ashley V Nabors BRONZE, Lubbock, Texas
Ashley V Nabors BRONZE, Lubbock, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1 comment

Almost half of American marriages now end in divorce. When adults get a divorce there are many effects in doing so. It is a painful thing to go through as a family, and as well as without a family. As the years go by, I think that the divorce rate will increase, not decrease. Divorce is sad and heartbreaking. I know from experience.

My mother and father divorced when I was six. Since I was so young, I wasn't sure what to think, but as I have grown older it has really hit me hard. Not having my biological dad around for the past ten years and seeing my friends with their wonderful fathers breaks my heart. Fathers are supposed to always be there for their daughters, treat them like princesses, and just be a dad, and I haven't really had that feeling before. When my parents divorced, it not only tore our family love and feelings apart but it also tore us apart physically. Many families still stay in the same area or city as the other spouse but not us. We moved states away. My mom, my brother, and I moved from Georgia to Texas while my dad moved to South Carolina. Moving away because of this incident caused money problems too.

In Texas, we lived in an apartment. It wasn't a nasty one. It was actually pretty nice. Before we moved, my mom met a man that lived in Lubbock. He really helped us out with money and food. The reason we had trouble with money was partly because my dad hardly ever paid child support. That was really hard on my mom because although she was working, the pay for her job was just not enough. I was too little to understand, but I wasn't needy. The financial issues happen in probably ninety percent of divorces. Money was an effect of our divorce, but it can also be a cause of one.

Another effect of the high divorce rate is the children's lives. Like myself, young kids can grow up without ever really getting to know their father. When that occurs, they grow up and realize what they missed out on. Also, if they are teenagers when this happens, the child is likely to become lonely or feel like the parents divorce was their fault. Teens' emotions would most likely me intense and heartbreaking. Whatever the problem is, I think that it isn't fair to the child or children of the adults to have to go through something so devastating. On the other hand, divorce can teach kids to become independent. While the parents are paying attention to the divorce and not the child then the kid learns to just do things for him or herself.

Lastly, a divorce could happen where one of the adults wants a divorce and the other doesn't. When something like that happens there are two different effects. The first would be that of the adult that wanted the divorce. His or her emotion would probably be content. The spouse would apparently not care what the other wants to do or thinks would be best for their relationship. However, the adult that didn't want the divorce would go into depression. He or she wouldn't be able to cope with such problem, resulting in psychotic actions or doing something to get someone's attention and or love.

The divorce rate is growing and growing in America as the years pass by. Society is getting worse, and as it does it impacts what people do. When my parents divorced, it wasn't very popular, but as I grow up I see more and more parents getting a divorce. It is a terrible thing to go through and also a terrible thing to see. There isn't anyway to stop it, and if there was I'm sure someone would have done it long ago. The love for others is just growing weak. My experience with divorce has changed me forever, mostly in a bad way but also in a good way, but I know I'm not the only one that it has affected so tremendously.

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This article has 10 comments.

on Apr. 27 2015 at 12:30 pm
ABPippins SILVER, League City, Texas
5 articles 0 photos 42 comments

Favorite Quote:
To die may be an awfully big adventure, but to love is an even grander affair -myself

This is almost exactly what happened with my parents when they divorced and how it affected me and my siblings.

Indygirl1998 said...
on Jan. 28 2013 at 9:26 pm
Indygirl1998, Evansville, Indiana
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world." Calvin

My mom and dad divorced when I was really young, even younger than you were. When I was in elementary school I hardly ever noticed that there was any difference between my life and other kids. I saw my dad once a week, but until middle school and high school I never realized just how much I missed out on. We had never been too close, because as I grew older I grew apart from him even more, but now I face the one question that involuntarily rings through minds like ours: "Where do I go to fill this gap? What can I do?"

soccerluva said...
on Nov. 14 2011 at 10:53 am

you go person


Helene BRONZE said...
on Apr. 8 2011 at 9:53 pm
Helene BRONZE, Arvada, Colorado
1 article 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
when you look back 30 years from now you don't look at what you were wearing but what you learned

im going through this right now it offical in July. Its really hard for me and and my 10 year old sister. one of my parents wants a divorce (mom) and the other does not (dad). the last time i saw him all he did was putting all his problems on me!!!!! i have my own thank you!!! my mom is going to school and has No job and no money!!!! i dont know how we do it.  I LOVE YOUR ARTICLE AND I CAN RELATE SOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!  

on Mar. 8 2011 at 7:15 pm
teacat749 BRONZE, Whitefish Bay, Wisconsin
4 articles 0 photos 151 comments

Favorite Quote:
We do not quit playing because we grow old. We grow old because we quit playing.
-Oliver Wendell Holmes

I'm really sorry that you had to go through that emotional pain. : ( 

But this was really awesomely written!

on Mar. 8 2011 at 7:14 pm
teacat749 BRONZE, Whitefish Bay, Wisconsin
4 articles 0 photos 151 comments

Favorite Quote:
We do not quit playing because we grow old. We grow old because we quit playing.
-Oliver Wendell Holmes

 I'm sorry. : ( 

Another ironic thing...

My parents got married on Friday, June 13th. And believe me, their marrige IS unlucky.

on Feb. 23 2011 at 1:15 pm
anonymouse222, CC, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 12 comments
I know how you feel... my parents signed their divorce papers this Valentine's Day. Ironic right...? I really connect with this and even if I didn't, you wrote so well that I would.

on Feb. 1 2011 at 3:54 pm
musicprincess PLATINUM, Braselton, Georgia
23 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
They say that love is forever, your forever is all that I need

This is truly very moving. Divorce is a tradgedy, but it is a learning experience that more and more of us have to go through. You're a brilliant writer!

twilight fan said...
on Jan. 10 2011 at 12:32 pm
you are a great writer and i think this the best thing i have ever read

on Feb. 28 2009 at 4:50 pm
RainWashed PLATINUM, Park City, Utah
46 articles 1 photo 86 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Repeat the good and the bad. Do it all again. And pile on the years."

I think this is a very powerful and moving piece!! YOu should continue doing things like this.