The things I feel make me realizae who I am, the way things are put into play show the kind of obstacles I will be over coming in my attempt to survive and live who I am and how I wanna be remembered as. As I sit in my room and hear the screaming angry spirits I lay down and feel the aching of my heart rip through my chest leaving me breathless and desperate for a way out of this nightmare.

Hoping, hoping for a new start, some hint of luxury and peace, no deep holes to slip into, holes that suck me down back to the depths of pain and depression. A hole that has no end or way out. Fear and confusion are just two things that can drive you to total insanity, a swirl of negativity claw at my throat, taking my breath away and leaving me helpless and afraid. Afraid of what is in the dark or what is on the otherside.

Knowing how strong of a will I have still doesn't change how greedy I can get at times, greed can drive even the most loyal and responsible person to the verge of total destruction, not only in their career but emotionally and worse, mentally. The loss of ones view of who they really are kills them, being greedy isnt something to be proud of. In society we are given so many opportunities but expected to choose a specific on to fit in, to love someone and support them for who they are is now the most difficult thing to do for society, but labeling and making someone be a copy of society and its cruel ways is much more easier then anything now.

We find a sweet escape everyday, believe it or not its not always pretty on how we see things change, or is taken care of. Dreaming, only to be sucked back into the reality of my flaws, my greatest regrets, my personal thoughts of the world and its ridiculous way, what is this I see? What is this we fear? Do I or we belong in this world? Am I mistake? Are we messengers? Or are we a test?

My mind is blank, filled with pleasant memories of the past, but is then pushed to the side by nightmares, monters that take over my mind and bring me down to my knees showing me the mistakes I have made, the negative forces from the world, many questions that have been left unanswered. We try so hard to be what our parents wanted us to be or what out teachers tell us to be, but in all honesty, aren't we enough as we are now?