I was in 8th grade the first time I was dress coded. One of my female choir teachers escorted me to the principal’s office after informing me that the 7th grade males in our classroom were being distracted by my black leggings and how much of an inconvenience it was for her to stop her lesson in order to deal with the situation.

When we arrived at the office, they sat and questioned me for over thirty minutes about my knowledge on the school policies and reputation I was obligated to uphold as an active participant in daily school activities. They then asked me to call my mom so she could get off work to bring me a pair of “less attention grabbing” pants that wouldn’t “effect the day to day life of the other students and faculty”. I refused. Even as a fourteen year old, I knew this wasn’t right. Female students were expected to make it their duty to put a male’s comfort and education over her own. I didn’t understand what I could have been doing that was so horrible. As if it was MY fault middle school boys couldn’t control themselves in the presence of a female body. As if it was MY fault I was denied an education that day, so I could make the male teachers in my school feel comfortable and not feel the need to act on the pedophilic thoughts they experienced. As if MY fourteen year old body in leggings gave people the right to make sexually suggestive jokes that promoted the acceptance of rape culture in our society. As if it was MY fault that socially, I wasn’t afforded the same respect as my fellow male students and teachers. As if it was my fault they felt the need to enforce the values of gender inequality.

Looking back, I wish I could have spoken up for not only myself, but for all of the affected female students in my school and community. Women are so much more than the opinions and desires of men. No one should ever make a fourteen year old girl or any child feel as though they’re an inconvenience, or have something to feel ashamed of because of their gender. I believe in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. I believe in the importance of gender equality at all ages and in all environments. This I believe.