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Walking Accompanied Through Darkness
Past
Walking alone through unlit passages
is something I have become familiar with.
I am afraid of the beauty of roses
becuase of the thorns that come with it.
Cracks
and scars
trace my skin.
So many, in fact
that I cannot tell
where they end
and where I begin.
Shadows
are my companions.
Self-hatred
is my sole friend.
(He is always with me.)
I am the moon.
I will always chase after the light of life.
(But we will never meet.)
Present
You have tuaght me now
that I never walk alone.
And while it is still dark,
this pure blackness seems less daunting with you by my side.
I now have
my cracks
and scars
outlined,
for the world to see.
The thought that I am a glitch,
still weighs on my chest,
but,
I am slowly learning
that my imperfections
are an essential part of my human being.
I enjoy the beauty of roses now.
Thorns no longer scare me.
(I know now it is merely a part of their beauty.)
With your help, your love, your smile,
I will pick my feet up
hold my head high,
amd trudge up this mountain,
your voice by my side.
I am the moon.
I will always chase after the light of life.
(But you are my eclipse.)
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I have always been fascinated by eclipses. How the dark and the light swirl together, merge together, for just one moment. How, for eternity, the sun and the moon are caught in an infinte loop of tag; but for just a small sliver of time, they meet.
This is the best analogy I could find to describe my feelings. And this does not even completely cover them.
My inspiration for this poem was my beautiful, amazing, wonderful, second family.
To call you my friends is a lie, best friends a severe understatment.
I have never met anyone quite like all of you. You acccept my weirdness, my habit of yelling when I'm excited. You have figured out the ways in which to decode my speech when I talk at the speed of lightning.
You are my eclipse. My moment when my dark merged with my light.
So this is dedicated to you, to all of you.
To my 2 AM conversations. To my incredibly accepting loves who are always there. To my fellow Peer Diversity members. To the ones who always want to read my writing even when its not that good.
You bring out the best in me. You are my inspiration.
Thank you for everything you do.