I

nothing stays inside of me, no,

nothing holds me down

i’m lightweight

like a feather in the breeze

soaring

drifting and

dipping

floating

away

it’s all

in the calories

that i refuse

to keep

within

or consume

at all

i can live

without depending

on them

i’m free

like the breeze

itself

II

the freedom is

addicting

i’m stuck in this

cycle

and i can’t think right

anymore

it’s weighing me

down

dragging me along

must i keep

moving?

glittering ink

appears in spots

at the edges of my vision

dancing,

teasing

it’s so beautiful

it’s eroding my

soul

and wearing through

my skull

my mind hurts.

i hurt.

but i can’t get out

this freedom

isn’t

free.