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pinky promises
The worst mistake I ever made was believing my mother when
She would apologize for this pain
in my heart
in my face
in my chest
and claim that “it would never happen again”
Always pinky promises.
I believed her because I was six years old
and I did not know better
but as the promises were broken
over
and over
and over
and
I forgave
and forgave
and forgave
and
then I grew up.
And suddenly, at sixteen
I was deep in conversation with my mother and
she asked me
“why I was unable to trust these boys”
they were
gorgeous and
kind and
seemed to have good intentions.
“Where did I go wrong with you?”
she would ask.
I shook my head and
looked away and
bit my tongue from reminding her of all of her broken
gorgeous and
kind and
good-intentioned pinky promises.
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