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Outside Says One, Inside Says None
Outside, I'm ecstatic to be a senior;
inside, I don't think I've ever been more nervous for anything.
Outside, I'm ready to move on and be done with swim;
inside, 10-year-old me hates present-me for quitting before my senior year.
Outside, I'm happy with my decision to cut my hair and don't care what others say;
inside, I hurt from all the things I hear about it and wish I never cut it.
Outside, I'm comfortable and confident in my body;
inside, I cry because my legs now rub together when I walk.
Outside, I'm positive I am ready to stop swimming, that it will be good for me;
inside, I don't think I have a personality outside of the pool and am afraid for it to be over.
Outside, I'm hesitant for who I share things with because I'm “private”;
inside, I wish I could tell people how I feel, but I never want to hurt the way I did.
Outside, I'm telling people I want to stay in Wisconsin for college;
inside, I wish I could go far away and never come back.
Outside, I'm living exactly how I always wished my life would be going;
inside, I can pick out every little detail I long to change about myself, physically and mentally.
Outside, I'm counting down the days until graduation, when I can get out of here;
inside, I don't want to have to experience the unknown without my friends.
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