Chemically | Teen Ink

Chemically

October 27, 2023
By deadgirlcrawling GOLD, West Des Moines, Iowa
deadgirlcrawling GOLD, West Des Moines, Iowa
11 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every setback you've forgiven me is a kingly gift you've given me"<br /> -Bennet Foddy


These weren’t meant to be read

I was going to sing them,

I was made to sing, 

More than I was made to write


The gods, with my thread wove a poet

The thread, the voice of an angel

I had plenty of warning,

Plenty of time,

I allowed myself to unravel.

I dropped the thread:


My voice.


I allowed myself to be unmade

Chemically.

This poem suffers for it, 

A mere shadow of the song,

The song that the universe is singing, 

Singing so only I can hear

The melody, my holy burden,

Muted, shriveled by my cowardice.


The author's comments:

This poem is about my failure to confront my feelings about my gender, which resulted in me being “too late” to transition. When my voice dropped, I effectively gave up on my future of writing and singing the songs in my head, and deprived the rest of the world of them.


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