People look at me and they expect someone who is
quiet and
smart and
maybe just maybe
a little insecure.
They don’t expect me to be outspoken or
to have convictions or
a wicked sense of humor.
Once they see there’s more to me, they
make assumptions, like
i know everything
i only care about grades
i never make mistakes
i’m good at everything.
What they don’t know is,
i get scared too
sometimes i don’t like me
what they say matters, even if i don’t want it to
i’m not perfect.
Most people don’t know that my facade is just that
a front i put on for the world
so they can’t see how worried
and sad i am
Supposedly it’s a defense mechanism,
this humor of mine.
It works too well,
driving people away
when all i want if for them to stay
and learn who i am
without the face i show to the world.
No one cracks my mask,
so no one sees the real me.