Dear KG,
Spring never came for us
And neither did you.
You did not return to me until last summer
When everything seemed fine in my life.
While you were gone,
I tore out your so-called plants
With the tools from my friends.
I pulled them out from their roots
Because they were nothing but weeds.
There is no point investing in weeds.
You are so skilled at leaving the garden
With the gate open,
But bad at locking it on your way out.
Every time you came back,
You claimed you wanted to restore everything.
But you lied.
You never had enough water.
You always used the wrong tools.
You did not know
Which seeds to plant during the seasons.
You tried to restore the soil back
By overwatering everything.
Every time I returned to my side of the garden,
It was always destroyed.
You let your new female “friends”
Leave their footprints on my side of the garden.
I worked hard to maintain my side of the garden.
Why did you let them destroy it?
The next time you return to the garden,
It will be gone.
The least you could have done
Was leave me a note explaining your actions.
You can keep your tools,
Keep your water,
And your seeds.
You already hurt my feelings
And now you will pay the price.
You can go create new gardens with those other females,
But I will never let you back inside my garden.
I will finally tear down the garden
And put up the sign, “No Trespassing.”
The rest of the garden will rot
Like your heart will when you finally realize
What you lost.
Sincerely, Me
P.S. If she dumps you,
Don’t come back to me.
I need real flowers
Because I’m done sifting through weeds.