She was luckier than most.
Most kids whose dads were like hers
Lost track of them for months,
Maybe years,
Maybe forever.
But to a girl
Whose life
Always included
the man in the flight suit
Whose name was Dad
Day By Day
Three months is no different
from six,
from twelve,
from forever.

So that last night
She crawled into the chair
next to Dad in the flight suit,
Tomorrow
he’d be gone
A last rock before eternity happened.
The television on
Light from a lighthouse
Pushing away the dark
Words blending together
Singing a lullaby.
Rock me, Daddy, Rock me Slow.
Rock me, Daddy, Never Let Go.

Three months actually did go by
Even though they had just started
and Dad in the flight suit came back
to a chair
Vacant
Still.
And three months actually did go by
and then four,
five,
six,
and then forever.
And she did not get in the chair
With Dad in the flight suit
Again.
She was big now,
and she could fall asleep
She had learned to rock
Herself
Devoid of his warmth
No lighthouse
Just a lullaby
Locked inside a motionless chair
She grew up
Even though she hadn’t tried.
Rock me, Daddy, Rock me Slow.
Rock me, Daddy, Never Let Go.

Years actually did go by
She stood on a field
An Elysium of uncertainty.
She had ten minutes
a blink
a quick breath
for “Good bye”
Until the summer was over
And she
would be
Almost
Like him.
That day
He cried
For the first time
Loss, pride mixed
crystalized
In his eyes.
She marched
And Dad in the flight suit
Wasn’t there anymore
Only his tears.
Rock me, Daddy, Rock me Slow.
Rock me, Daddy. Never Let Go.

Three months actually did go by
Even though they had just started
And the rocking of the chair
Morphed and twisted
And became the rocking of a ship.
The flight suit came out of the closet
Shut by images
of the pajama-clad girl
In the chair
And it fit her
and it turned blue
Like the skies that had
swallowed him
for three months
And it swallowed her
and three months actually did go by
and Dad in the flight suit had been there
Smile, Voice, Eyes
Every day
In the chair
The one she left behind
Grasping a fragile picture
The Daughter in the blue suit
Had not been there.
But still Dad in the flight suit had rocked
Rocked her
Front page
Running Light
His name, his voice, his eyes
Crystals fall from the sky
Day By Day
You rock,
You rock me,
I fall asleep
By your side.
The chair
Swayed as does the ship
And in his arms
She rocked
Her song had been heard
From miles away
Crystals casting reflections
in her mind
Materializing
She chases them
She runs
I will fly
I will fly for you
Into the skies that owned you
And fall from those skies
Into the seas
That own me.
Three months actually did go by
And the flight suit engulfs her
And she flies
And he watches
And she falls
And he holds her
And they rock.
Rock Me, Daddy, three months by,
Rock Me, Daddy,
A lullaby,
Blue like the sky.
Rock Me, Daddy, crystal eyes…
Watching me fly.