Brianna | Teen Ink

Brianna

February 16, 2015
By ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)


Anyone who knew her last name knew the fire she set in the heart of the expresser. I called her Bri, girl wonder, the original poetic queen by her own words. She called me her poetic god when I was first getting off of my feet in expressive poetry.
I took it slow, like a freeze-frame of which I’m not too proud of. If I may, I’d like to sort of explain what was happening in my position.  A beautiful day, cirrus clouds, December Alabamian weather. I was leaving, never to return or try my hand at our love again and all I wanted to do was show love to the one who’d declared she would desire it from me.
Insane.
Insane for thinking that a request of which as simple as it is can rearrange the very fabric of time would be accepted into the universe and granted to me as a blessing and a step forward in lively progress. My last wish was a simple kiss.
But it wasn’t meant to be.
Why? Why something so harmless as a that would put so many barriers before itself in an effort to avoid it is beyond me, but what I do know is that it haunts me to know that I missed my opportunity and let out an emotion of neglection, and I hope she didn’t create a feel of aggravated rejection In her heart, for that wasn’t my intention.
She, my dancing queen, right? Shier than the sun at two A.M, too self-conscious about the smallest detail yet still flawless, true poet by accident yet a poet all the same.
This woman’s worth, like Maxwell. The worst like Jhene Aiko. But my ribbon in the sky like Stevie Wonder, basically a symphony of emotion that I played a part in. I, a master of ceremonies in her play of life as she expressed herself and wrapped me in layer upon layer of unknowing intimacy.
Why? Why do I always fall for your type?
Why did I fall for you?
I can’t explain without uprising the controversy in my heart, the controversy growing in my soul,
Love.
What I believe we were trying to achieve before the divide, the main reason I sit on the couch listening to love songs and counting my losses as they compare to my blessings and curse the time that brings turns in events, buildings to the ground, men to their knees in submission to the will of it.
Love
What I would’ve said if I’d had time to show more of it. You are the ocean to my sea creature, the grasslands to my herbivore, the nature to my nature, a perfect fit through connection.
Thick lips, wide hips, dark chocolate skin with a clueless soul, I was the gateway in progress, the channel for the guided ship. You made me find myself better, closer, more accurately, and I will never forget you for it.
Not everyone is meant to keep in contact, but our souls are entwined within a universe all their own, a dance floor to you, a laptop and forum for me, completely customizable, and a warm embrace where our worlds collide and create the aftermath, the afterlife, of which all shall witness the greatness of such a creation.
The abdication of a king, the separation of a natural pair, the things that we must live through, so if you remember me, When you remember me, think of the possibilities, the unknown realm that we never explored.
Brianna
The heat of the fire I kindled in my heart, the girl who left the mark of possibility and opened my mind.
My first queen, my billionth girlfriend, but first pending love. I gave her her credits and accolades once more.


The author's comments:

Well, this was the girl I left behind when I moved. I was holding back so much heat when making this, so I personally think it sounds a bit stiff, but I just had to get it out.


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This article has 31 comments.


on Sep. 22 2015 at 9:56 am
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

thx lol and noted

on Sep. 12 2015 at 8:23 pm
EmmaClaire0823 GOLD, Bay Minette, Alabama
13 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be the change you wish to see in the world."

This is really good. The emotion is there though it is a tad stiff. That makes sense though. You still conveyed your emotions really well. The fact you didn't kiss her intrigues me so I wish you would have spent more time on that point. Also, I just think that the line "You are the ocean to my sea creature, the grasslands to my herbivore, the nature to my nature, a perfect fit through connection" could be more personal. This was really great!

on Jul. 25 2015 at 7:17 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

thank you very much. And actually, I wrote down something else, but I typed it like this, so I guess you could say yes and no lol thank you for reading

on Jul. 25 2015 at 5:53 pm
addictwithapen PLATINUM, Norfolk, Virginia
21 articles 14 photos 163 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm at it again as an addict with a pen." - twenty one pilots, addict with a pen

I like this! I could really feel the bittersweet love that I think you were trying to convey. It makes me kind of sad, but at the same time happy that I got to read such a touching piece. Just one thing I would like to point out: nearing to end of the piece, when it says "the nature to my nature", I was wondering if you meant to repeat the same word twice? Overall, a very good bit of writing. :)

on Jun. 28 2015 at 6:01 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

XD thx, Nell. Sadly, I don't believe she got to see it. I guess it didn't circulate enough to get to someone she knew or to her directly. But, hey XD at least you guys see it, so I'm cool, I guess

on Jun. 28 2015 at 1:54 am
Nelly_Nell GOLD, Bakersfield, California
11 articles 0 photos 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
'' For every dark night there is an even brighter day"








-Tupac Shukar

This is absolutly beautiful I love the style and how I was able to feel every bit of what was being said again this was amazing great job. I hope the girl this is to gets to read it.

on Jun. 24 2015 at 7:29 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

XD thx, don't feel threatened and thx again lol yep, already taken care of. thx for reading, glad u enjoyed it

Izzy777 SILVER said...
on Jun. 24 2015 at 6:30 pm
Izzy777 SILVER, Tampa, Florida
9 articles 0 photos 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I always wonder why birds stay in one place when they can fly anywhere around the world. But then I ask myself the same question."

We said in the chat we'd exchange writing critiques (:

Izzy777 SILVER said...
on Jun. 24 2015 at 6:28 pm
Izzy777 SILVER, Tampa, Florida
9 articles 0 photos 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I always wonder why birds stay in one place when they can fly anywhere around the world. But then I ask myself the same question."

Your writing style is so great that I FEEL THREATENED! Jeez man, SO BEAUTIFULLLLLLLLLLL

on Jun. 7 2015 at 5:52 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

thx lol glad you enjoyed it, and thx for reading

on Jun. 7 2015 at 11:17 am
Luv4Ever SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
7 articles 0 photos 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
A miracle is just another name for hard work
-Minho in "To The Beautiful You"

This poem really relays your emotions and i feel honored that you were willing to share them with me. I love your metaphors and this piece is beautiful. this piece is a little long for me but splendid nonetheless.

on Jun. 1 2015 at 11:35 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

thx XD glad you enjoyed it

on Jun. 1 2015 at 7:29 pm
Z.V.Oksana PLATINUM, Harrison, Arkansas
22 articles 1 photo 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Maybe you can afford to wait. Maybe for you there's a tomorrow. Maybe for you there's one thousand tomorrows, or three thousand, or ten, so much time you can bathe in it, roll around it, let it slide like coins through you fingers. So much time you can waste it.
But for some of us there's only today. And the truth is, you never really know.”
― Lauren Oliver, Before I Fall

Your writing style is phenomenal! WOW! WOW! And many more wows! where that came from, my friend. Your use of repitition portrays the quickness of this love and how it progresses, how you admire her, how she becomes a goddess in your eyes. Beautiful metaphors, you make the images dance as I read them.

on May. 21 2015 at 1:16 am
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

absolutely XD and thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it

on May. 20 2015 at 6:24 pm
EvalynnHeather GOLD, Clemmons, North Carolina
16 articles 4 photos 64 comments
I love this!! And all of your writing, its so beautiful. I have been in similar situations (except I was the girl), so i can relate Please check out some of my work :)

on May. 20 2015 at 4:20 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

thx for reading, oh believe me, I could've gone past this very much XD glad you enjoyed it

on May. 19 2015 at 9:40 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

Actually, all thanks goes to you for reading :) thx for reading and I'm glad u enjoyed it

on May. 19 2015 at 5:52 pm
BoobooBeetle DIAMOND, Jacksonville, Florida
74 articles 1 photo 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
“A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.”
G.K. Chesterton

"And you, you ridiculous people, you expect me to help you."
Denis Johnson

Wow, this is amazing. This, similarly happened to me, expect I was the girl. Just bravo! I truly hopes she reads this because it really would mean a lot... Thank you for publishing this and allowing me to read such beautiful writing with so much emotion that doesn't much exist in our society. Thank you!! :D XD

on May. 17 2015 at 7:41 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

XD Thank you for reading lol and, don't worry about ego, It won't reach the person it's for, so honestly I'm just thankful that somebody read it and liked it

NOIZTHIMS GOLD said...
on May. 17 2015 at 6:37 pm
NOIZTHIMS GOLD, South Jordan, Utah
15 articles 0 photos 51 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If your eyes could speak, what... what would they say?" -Max (from "The Book Thief")

Every girl on this page is verbally swooning, so I won't compliment your ego so much. This piece is excellent.