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Spin with me MAG

January 20, 2010
By Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
More by this author
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It wasn't me and I'll never do it again"

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Spin and spin, hit me again.
The stars are fireflies,
I'm lost chasing them in your eyes.
Punch me, punch me.

The crash of the cymbals
The symphonic sounds
The timpani roll
Spin me 'round

Our bare feet pound the dirt.
Twirl with me, swirl with me
Spin and spin, hit me again.

Spin me, twist me
Tell me you love me
The trees whisper their shame
They don't know a thing.
I won't quit this game.

The crash of the cymbals
The symphonic sounds
The timpani roll
Stop.

© Meagan Y., Tigard, OR

The author's comments:
I like this one, but I wouldn't mind shortening it... we'll see. If it doesn't get published in the magazine I'll fix it up.
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 20 comments.

keshialovesmusic said...
on May. 13 2014 at 3:37 pm
dont understand song  
beautifulspirit PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 23 2013 at 11:15 am
beautifulspirit PLATINUM, Alpharetta, Georgia
35 articles 0 photos 1398 comments

Favorite Quote:
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.<br /> --Eleanor Roosevelt

View profile
It's a cool song, has a good rhythm
magickMuse said...
on Dec. 22 2011 at 3:33 pm
i really like this piece. wish there was more lyrics, and I really want to read more of your work:)
Shortblueeyes224 DIAMOND said...
on May. 26 2011 at 11:56 am
Shortblueeyes224 DIAMOND, Auburntown, Tennessee
57 articles 0 photos 76 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Are We Happy Plastic People&quot;- Casting Crowns &quot;While we&#039;re sung to sleep by philosophies that save the trees and kill the children&quot; - Casting Crowns &quot;It&#039;s such a secret place, the land of tears&quot;Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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I really love this piece you've written. :)
ForgottenSomeHow PLATINUM said...
on Mar. 18 2011 at 2:52 pm
ForgottenSomeHow PLATINUM, Harrison, Arkansas
39 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
Many Things Are Said,<br /> Many Words Are Meant,<br /> It&#039;s The One&#039;s That Hurt You The Most,<br /> You Don&#039;t Never Forget.

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I Love It. In My Head It Sound Perfect. I Love It. Truely Do. The Ending Is Amazing. (:
SpringRayyn PLATINUM said...
on Oct. 15 2010 at 7:27 pm
SpringRayyn PLATINUM, Lakeville, Minnesota
34 articles 2 photos 658 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Don&#039;t punish yourself,&quot; she heard her say again, but there would be punishment and pain, and there would be happiness too. That was writing.&quot;<br /> --Markus Zusak, &quot;The Book Thief&quot;

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Well is she on a merry-go-round thing like on the picture? maybe you could make her fall off and get bruised or something and relate that to how love can hurt or something?
Mopsicle BRONZE said...
on Oct. 14 2010 at 9:41 pm
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It wasn&#039;t me and I&#039;ll never do it again&quot;

View profile

Yeah... I was going for something sudden. Any suggestion on how I could change it?

It is off, and honestly this is not my favorite poem out of the ones I've posted, but most people seem to like it.

Mopsicle BRONZE said...
on Oct. 14 2010 at 9:40 pm
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It wasn&#039;t me and I&#039;ll never do it again&quot;

View profile
Thank you so much :)
SpringRayyn PLATINUM said...
on Oct. 13 2010 at 10:45 pm
SpringRayyn PLATINUM, Lakeville, Minnesota
34 articles 2 photos 658 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Don&#039;t punish yourself,&quot; she heard her say again, but there would be punishment and pain, and there would be happiness too. That was writing.&quot;<br /> --Markus Zusak, &quot;The Book Thief&quot;

View profile
I like the use of the word "symphonic!" C: but the ending seems a bit off to me.
baby_girla SILVER said...
on Aug. 7 2010 at 9:47 pm
baby_girla SILVER, St.Mary&#39s, Alaska
9 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
it is left by the imperfect work that the next one can be born(odelion redon)

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this is a great song I wish there was more because I love the way it sounded when I started to sing it and I sung it alot for you. thank you and you should write more songs because you are real awesome and that I love this one
DarkTruth BRONZE said...
on Aug. 5 2010 at 8:16 pm
DarkTruth BRONZE, Houston, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 14 comments
View profile
really wish ther were more lyrics 
Mopsicle BRONZE said...
on Aug. 3 2010 at 10:54 am
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It wasn&#039;t me and I&#039;ll never do it again&quot;

View profile
Thank you!
Mr.Mills said...
on Aug. 3 2010 at 8:13 am
hey great lyrics it was a real great song must have took a lot of thought.
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD said...
on Jul. 12 2010 at 4:23 pm
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Why does everyone think I need a man? Look if you find a guy who is decent, good with kids and has respect for women, call me.&quot; &quot;It is better to have loved, than to have never loved at all.&quot;

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your welcome!
Mopsicle BRONZE said...
on Jul. 12 2010 at 12:41 pm
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It wasn&#039;t me and I&#039;ll never do it again&quot;

View profile
Thank you!
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD said...
on Jul. 10 2010 at 3:34 pm
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Why does everyone think I need a man? Look if you find a guy who is decent, good with kids and has respect for women, call me.&quot; &quot;It is better to have loved, than to have never loved at all.&quot;

View profile
Awesome work!!!
Mopsicle BRONZE said...
on Jun. 5 2010 at 8:49 am
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It wasn&#039;t me and I&#039;ll never do it again&quot;

View profile
Thanks! I'm so excited that it's getting published, this was honestly unexpected. I'm not sure when it's coming out but I'll see if I can find out
Louis GOLD said...
on Jun. 2 2010 at 3:10 am
Louis GOLD, Paris, Other
17 articles 0 photos 54 comments

Favorite Quote:
Too much isn&#039;t enough.

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Hi! Very nice poem, I really appreciated reading it! I love the way you illustrated the feelings of bedazzlement, confusion, and thrill... Congratulations for getting published in the print magazine too! When is it coming out? My piece 'Cigarettes' will also get published in that edition! Can't wait for us to see it! Again, bravo!
Mopsicle BRONZE said...
on Feb. 23 2010 at 4:47 pm
Mopsicle BRONZE, West Palm Beach, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It wasn&#039;t me and I&#039;ll never do it again&quot;

View profile
Thank you =)
aspiring.author.09 PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 22 2010 at 10:50 pm
aspiring.author.09 PLATINUM, Beaumont, Other
34 articles 0 photos 70 comments
View profile
I don't think you should change anything. It was just the right length - any shorter and I may not have gotten as clear of an image. The senses portrayed were vivid. I personally love when people end their poems with 'stop' when it fits, and it did fit in your case. Nicely done.