The Perfect One | Teen Ink

The Perfect One

July 1, 2011
By IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
41 articles 0 photos 650 comments

Favorite Quote:
‎"I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world: I run my world." - Beyoncé


It is hard to be called oh-so perfect
When having to act with what they expect
Is the only way to live my life now
And, yes, I cannot even take a bow

The daffodils are turning crimson red
I cannot rest and lay down on my bed
Because I have something to take care of
When all I want is to get those things off

The river I bathe in is running dry
And whenever I fly up to the sky
Diff’rent airplanes would hit me suddenly
Sending me back to earth reluctantly

And then, I would start looking for the sheep
That was eaten by the wolf as I sleep.


The author's comments:
Pressure is not good and I couldn’t get away from them no matter how hard I try to. The responsibilities that people impose on me are exhausting and I don’t know if I could still relax. (I think I need to bathe in a hot spring… and, oh, relax…)

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This article has 5 comments.


on Aug. 6 2011 at 2:03 pm
Love.Hate.Passion., Spring Valley, Illinois
0 articles 0 photos 356 comments

Favorite Quote:
~Hope. Faith. Love~
~Be proud of who you are.You are all unique in a different way.~
~I WILL NOT fade into oblivion , and become less than
a distant memory.~

It's certainly a nice poem , which is also very relatable. Your rhyming was not it's best , but your word choices and imagery were impressive :)

on Aug. 2 2011 at 10:01 pm
callmebaddog SILVER, Spokane, Washington
8 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today.
-James Dean

I love the first stanza! And the first line of the second best! Very, very nice!

on Aug. 1 2011 at 12:46 am
Raytheraym PLATINUM, Belton, Missouri
47 articles 35 photos 457 comments
Very good! I really like the first line of the second stanza.

on Jul. 16 2011 at 11:00 pm
TheHangingGirl BRONZE, Winter Haven, Florida
1 article 1 photo 250 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Poets utter great and wise things that they themselves can not comprehend."

Word choice = Amazing!

on Jul. 16 2011 at 3:09 pm
NinjaGirl BRONZE, Valley City, North Dakota
1 article 0 photos 202 comments

Favorite Quote:
The only thing holding us back in life is our desire to stay where we are and not venture further.
~Some random person on the Internet :P

I really like your word choice and the theme of the poem. I know how you feel; sometimes I have a million things to do when what I really want is to take a break. Nice job :)