THe Unknown HIlls | Teen Ink

THe Unknown HIlls

September 26, 2009
By arElana PLATINUM, Fair Lawn, New Jersey
arElana PLATINUM, Fair Lawn, New Jersey
24 articles 0 photos 94 comments

Wandering through the forest I feel fear
I hear footsteps and see shadows around
Anything can be hiding very near
I sit so quiet - hear that scary sound
I look and see nothing it is so dark
I can’t stand this dark and so I must fight
I try and try until I see a spark
A shining lovely beautiful bright light
I don't have to be scared ever again
Now that I have light I feel such great hope
My feelings start to soar from one to ten
Even if I have no light I can cope
As I wander through the hills where I belong
I feel such joy I have to sing a song


The author's comments:
Please give me a litttle feedback either good or bad.

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This article has 4 comments.


on Jan. 8 2013 at 12:28 pm
1stclasspoetrylover GOLD, Highland Village, Texas
11 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
by Buddha

Very vivid detail. Much fear seems to arise out of the poem as if the speaker was trapped not once before. Strong diction. Everyone needs a "spark" to "ignite" thier hope or spirit as this poem did here. very well done

on Oct. 3 2011 at 3:09 pm
Mellifluous SILVER, Arlington, Virginia
8 articles 0 photos 10 comments
This is an excellent Shakespearean sonnet. I love the imagery. You have a few issues with rhythm--where the wrong word has to have the accent in order to fit the meter--but that's not too much of a problem. Great job!

on Nov. 29 2010 at 9:46 pm
LeahSkai BRONZE, Florissant, Missouri
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

I like this sonnet. I like the opening few lines the most. It makes the reader want to read more. The vagueness is enchanting. Read my sonnet and tell me what you think?

 


Milo! said...
on Mar. 14 2010 at 4:58 pm
I really love this. I really like how everyone can relate to this. I hope you keep writing, because this is great. You should check out some of my stuff. I think you would like it.