Perks of Being a Wallflower

Have any of you ever read the “Perks of Being a Wallflower”? I did. Hmm, how do I explain it? Let me see if I can jog your memory a little bit. Have you ever read a book that was so moving that you might have cried, or maybe read a poem that was so deep to you that in a way you felt like your whole life might have just changed course just because of it? Maybe you haven’t had that experience with anything like that yet. But let me tell you now, that to me, it is one of the best experiences to have while reading.
Whenever this happens to me a bundle of emotions arrive to my mind, and they are all contradicting with each other. When this happens, I feel happy, sad, sympathetic, empathetic, depressed, relieved, and a strong sense of relaxation. Which is way too overwhelming for my brain to handle so, I cry. It isn’t really a sad cry though, and it really doesn’t mean I am happy either it’s just a way of letting out my bundle of emotions that arose from the events in the book. After my episode of crying, I feel content. In a strange way everything else in the world has stopped and I feel like nothing else has to happen for me to make my life complete. It is such a strange occurrence, but nevertheless I love it.
To get back to my point, this occurrence happened when I finished the book “Perks of Being a Wallflower”. Just the pure innocents of the story moved me. The author says things in this book that I don’t think anyone else has the guts to say. After all, this book was a pretty big controversy when it first came out. All of the events that happen to the main character relate so well to the life of a teen that is starting high school. Every challenge they face, every moment of accomplishment they have, and all the new realities they have are all described so well in this book. From being someone unnoticed and uninvolved to becoming someone who finds his place and by doing so, has his moment of feeling “infinite”.
When I tell people I like this book they always ask me “So, what are the perks of being a wallflower?” I don’t think I have ever told anyone the answer. I think it has something to do with feeling trusted and being ever so slightly happy that not all eyes are on you. I guess it’s hard to explain if you don’t already know. I should know. I am the wallflower of my school. I don’t really get noticed unless I am already friends that person. I am the bystander when it comes to things like smoking or drinking. I mean once in a while I would do it, but not like everyone else. I do see things that I am not meant to. Which is probably why I keep everything to myself (Unless of course I writing on here). I just can’t tell which things are the secrets or which things are just the random comments anymore. So I try not to let too much out. I guess in that sense I am that person always trusted. All of these things are basically just things that I apply to the book when I read it.
My favorite parts of the book have to be whenever he talks about feeling “infinite”. It makes me want to have that moment of feeling infinite. Just to have a smooth rock song playing and stand in the back of a pick-up while screaming in a tunnel. The only other way I can describe that feeling is “perfect”. I know what you’re thinking. Nothing is perfect, but that feeling of just bliss is something that comes pretty darn close. I think I actually had that feeling a few days ago, but it wasn’t while standing in the back of a pick-up. It was much simpler than that, but I am pretty sure that initial feeling was the same.
I was just walking around the town with my best friend when we came to a large expanse of grass in our park. She stopped and sort of flopped onto the grass, and I slowly followed her with a less dramatic way of sitting down. Ha, anyways, I lied down on my back and watched the clouds. My friend then asked me something I don’t think I will ever forget “If you were free enough to feel like a cloud, sinless enough to be an angel, and confident enough to say anything to anyone, what would your first words and/ or actions be?” Wow. I have never thought of anything so amazing. She had to go home before I could think of an answer, and I still don’t have one. But I did think about it for a long time. After she left I just sat there in the grass under the warm sun rays just pondering this question as the clouds moved onward.