Rewrite #1: I sit silently on a wooden bench with paint peeling off it, while the rain patters on the cement slab in front of me, creating a depressing harmony. The rain is getting my hair and clothes wet, causing the feeling that they’re weighing me down with the weight of the water soaked within them. I spot a small bird within the stormy, gray sky, struggling to keep up in the air. It’s a soothing gray type of color that blends in with the bleak colored clouds. I can barely open my eyes throughout the rainfall in the gloomy afternoon. It was supposed to be a perfect day but here I am, sitting on a dispiriting looking bench at a bus stop, waiting for a bus that was never going to come. I longingly gaze into the dejecting rain, willing it to stop.

Rewrite #2: I’m barely sitting on the wooden bench. It’s TOTALLY DISGUSTING. There’s like, paint PEELING off it. EWWW! Right?? So like the genius person I am, I’m just perching on it so only some parts of my pants have to endure the awful bench. It’s my enemy #1 if you ask me. Even worse, it’s RAINING. It’s raining CATS AND DOGS. Not literally of course, but it’s raining like crazyyy. It’s getting my beautiful, long, luscious hair and my SUPER EXPENSIVE clothes wet. I want to be back at home, sitting in front of the fireplace, sipping my cup of hot chocolate but nooo, my friends had “better” plans that turned out to be COMPLETELY IDIOTIC. I see a bird right now. It’s flying AWAY from me. URGH! Even a bird doesn’t want to be with me in this gruesome place. I command the sky to stop raining. It doesn’t work for some reason. I guess I’m stuck in this rain for the rest of my life. *shrug*