“Sis! I need your help!”

Helen sighed. Although Ash was adorable and the best/worst little brother in the whole world --best because he’s kind, worst because all little brothers are-- she had a life that needed her attention. That life might be laughed at by others, but a good book and some quiet anime time were a godsend to her. She rolled off her bed and pressed her feet into her favorite pink woolly slippers. Her room was kept neat and organized, so before she left Helen took a moment to make sure everything was in it’s proper place.
Satisfied, Helen padded down the hall, taking in the scent of pasta and fresh pesto as she went. Her mother knew pesto always tasted better fresh, so she kept a beautiful vegetable garden, full of basil, just outside. It’s heady aroma of herbs and assorted flowers gave the house a grounded feeling. It was because of this that it was Helen’s favorite place to relax, especially during sundown when the light turned the leaves a comforting shade of dark emerald.

Arriving at Ash’s door she knocked then nudged it open. The room’s owner was standing in the middle of the floor tapping a foot impatiently, his seriousness only matched by his favorite Power Rangers pajamas. The room wasn’t much to look at. Since he was only five, Ash’s room was how our parents decorated it before he was born. Lots of stuffed animals, pictures of baby feet -- things that her parents wanted to remember about him when he was small -- but nothing that really told you his personality. Which is to say, he doesn’t really know what it is yet.

“Finally, you’re here! Do you know this person?” He pointed to a small stuffed animal. It wasn’t really a stuffed animal, but a stuffed human doll dressed as Michael Jackson in his signature red jacket and wild black hair. Helen had never really known where he’d gotten it, but she suspected their grandmother, who was always bringing presents of some kind or another for the both of them.

“Yes,” she answered, puzzled, “why do you want to know?”

He rolled his eyes, as if the answer was obvious. He bent down and hit play on an ipod laying by his feet. Her ipad, Helen noticed. With the simple touch of the screen, Michael Jackson’s Thriller filled the air. After waiting a few moments, Ash’s small finger stabbed the air above the device.

“There!” He yelled. “I want to know what that word means.”

“Which one?”

“The word right before the line: ‘There’s no escaping the jaws of the alien this tiiiiiiime!’”

Helen laughed. His singing voice was truly awful, and the question so bizarre, but when she saw the hurt look on his face, she stopped and explained.

“I was just... surprised you wanted to know such a big word. It’s not commonly what a child your age wants to know about. It’s usually more along the lines of bugs, or poop.”
Ash stood waiting. Helen had paused to see if he would laugh at the word ‘poop’, but was unrewarded. She continued.
“Masquerade. It’s when someone is pretending to be someone else, like dress up, or when something is untrue but gives off the impression that it is true.”

Helen smiled inwardly, proud of her lexicon, as Ash frowned thoughtfully. He closed his eyes and murmured quietly to himself. Helen sat down on the floor, arms hugging her legs and chin resting on her knees, and watched him. She herself marveled at Ash, wondering if she had been so full of wonder and curiosity as he when she was young. Or if she’d been half as smart, realizing that Ash had understood all of her “big people” words, as he liked to call them.
When Ash finally opened his eyes, Helen continued to wait, knowing he had come to some conclusion and would share with her when he was good and ready. Ash turned to her, walked over and after waiting a moment for Helen to sit cross-wise, plopped down in her lap. His strangely deep eyes looked straight into hers.

“That’s a weird word. Why would anyone want to be someone they’re not?”

Helen paused. What could she say to him? Her first reaction was to just simplify it. Say, “because it’s fun,” or maybe just, “because.” But she felt it would be lying not to tell him what she really thought. There were so many reasons people tried not be themselves. Some have been hurt or insulted before for showing off their true selves, and some don’t want to be hurt again. Some want to hurt, shielding themselves from others in order extort or manipulate them.
But for Ash, the idea was completely alien, and Helen loved him all the more for it. She wrapped her arms around him and gave him a small squeeze, wishing the world was so simple that people would never hide themselves. She hesitated, answer on her tongue but refusing to be let out. Helen sighed and looked away, unable to say what was truly on her heart. Without returning his gaze, she answered.
“I don’t know.”