Hey, there she is. (Part 1 of 2) | Teen Ink

Hey, there she is. (Part 1 of 2)

October 16, 2010
By koolaid-dragonwarrior GOLD, Los Angeles, California
koolaid-dragonwarrior GOLD, Los Angeles, California
17 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils"
- Louis Hector Berlioz


“Hey, look over there,” a girl passing by my locker whispered to her friend, “There she is.”
Her name was Kalynn Cleveland. She was a 15-year-old sophomore who transferred from Lakecrest High School in Utah. When I saw her standing at the front door of Woodley High, my legs felt like wet noodles. My heart skipped a beat, my palms started to sweat, and my vision became fuzzy. She was beautiful. My friends told me that Kalynn was so ugly and mean that you wanted to punch her in the face. Suddenly, I felt extremely stupid to believe those rumors about Kalynn, which were spreading like wildfire. The real Kalynn was so pretty that I wanted to punch ME in the face. She had light blonde hair, a cute laugh, and an awesome body that turns heads wherever she goes. I guess you could have called it “love at first sight”.
My name is Kevin. I was 16 and was also a sophomore at Woodley High School, which was the only high school in the city of Woodley. I was born here in Lansing, and my parents dominated my life and my decisions since I was a baby. I never had a girlfriend, never ate fast food, never had my own computer, and never, ever kept up with current fashion trends because my mom always bought my clothes for me. Heck, I didn’t have my own cell phone until the seventh grade. I don’t think my parents intended to raise me to be the “independent” type. Thus, I became the timid, softspoken kid in school. I guess I could have considered myself physically fit. I was on the school football team for a year, although I’m wasn’t the biggest and strongest guy.
I was horrified to discover that students at our school harassed her constantly. Some bothersome, less beautiful girls (in my opinion) called her bad names and talked behind her back. Other, more popular girls treated her like trash. Guys hit on her and made offensive jokes about her body. It just seemed like Kalynn didn’t belong in Woodley High. Almost everyone poked at her and picked on her. Everyone, that is, except for me. As the days passed, my affections for her grew rapidly. I wanted to talk to her, but whenever I had the chance, my mouth would disconnect from my brain and I would sound completely dumb. Every time I passed her in the hallway I felt dizzy, and I couldn’t think straight whenever I caught a whiff of the faint scent she leaves when she walked past. Finally, I gathered up all the courage I could muster to talk to her. I saw Kalynn at her locker, and I quickly made my way to her. As she opened her backpack, I stuttered out my first question.
“Hey,K- Kalynn, it’s me, uh,
D***it, what’s my name?
.. uh, Kevin. I’m your partner in chemistry class.”
Suddenly, I felt utterly stupid. After what seemed like forever, she shut her locker with a loud bang, and gave me a dirty look. “I know that. Why are you talking to me? ” she inquired, angrily, “Are you here to bother me like your friends?” I was shocked. I had no clue how much pressure she was under at this school. “No, NO,” I managed to say, “I don’t judge people based on rumors, and I like you a lot. I came to ask if you have time after school to watch a movie with me.” Her cheeks reddened immediately, and she looked at the floor. “Like a date?” she said very softly. I think I blushed too, but I gathered up the courage to mumble, “……….. Yeah, a date, I guess.”

Somewhat reluctantly, probably because she doubted whether or not I was a friend, Kalynn agreed to meet after school. I told her I would pick her up two hours after school ended, and I headed home, punch-drunk with excitement.

I wheeled my mom’s new Ford out of the driveway. Gosh, she loved that car. If anything happened to it, she would strangle the person responsible, even if it was me who caused the damage. I prepared a box of chocolates and picked a rose for Kalynn. It was horribly corny, but I didn’t really care. I went over what I would say about a million times, out loud, on the way to her house. By the time I made the last right turn onto her block, I was so nervous that my heart was about to thump right out of my chest. As I approached her new address, 1370 Wax Boulevard, my heart fell like a rock all the way down into my stomach.

Her house was on fire.

TO BE CONTINUED. LOOK FOR “THERE SHE IS”, PART TWO.
THANKS FOR READING. PLEASE COMMENT BELOW. I NEED CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. xD THANKS AGAIN.


The author's comments:
My first fiction story. Enjoy.

and COMMENT.

Like seriously, please comment.

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This article has 5 comments.


on Oct. 29 2010 at 9:48 pm
koolaid-dragonwarrior GOLD, Los Angeles, California
17 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils"
- Louis Hector Berlioz

*thanks alot

on Oct. 29 2010 at 2:07 pm
koolaid-dragonwarrior GOLD, Los Angeles, California
17 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils"
- Louis Hector Berlioz

 alloootttt. part 2 is up too now if u wanna read that. :) thanks again

on Oct. 29 2010 at 1:57 pm
Internal-Love PLATINUM, Queens, New York
33 articles 3 photos 310 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing's black or white, its all just a shade of gray---

















TI "Live your Life" ft Rihanna

not as far as i could see :)

on Oct. 27 2010 at 9:38 pm
koolaid-dragonwarrior GOLD, Los Angeles, California
17 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils"
- Louis Hector Berlioz

thanks ALOT for the feedback.

do you think there's anything I can improve on?

thanks


on Oct. 27 2010 at 11:52 am
Internal-Love PLATINUM, Queens, New York
33 articles 3 photos 310 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing's black or white, its all just a shade of gray---

















TI "Live your Life" ft Rihanna

COOL.

u know 4 a guy, this romance story isnt so bad :)

i loved the word punch-drunk.

and i KNOW how annoying it is when ppl dont comment of ur work

 

THIS STORY'S GREAT! KEEP IT UP!