Succubus | Teen Ink


June 21, 2013
By Jakethesnake SILVER, Hernando, Mississippi
Jakethesnake SILVER, Hernando, Mississippi
6 articles 0 photos 96 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Read, Read... Read everything, then write."-William Faulkner

“Last night, I dreamed. I dreamed something terrible and frightening. I was being tortured. By whom, or what, I’m not sure. It seemed to drag on for hours. Their methods were raw, ameteur, and unpracticed, but effective. Very effective.

After they were done, they put me in a room with two other people. One a teenaged girl of about 17. Blonde, with brown eyes. A closer look revealed that it was dyed. Beside her hung a small girl of about 6 or 7. A sister maybe?

Our captors left us in the the dark, the clanging of the door echoing through the metal chamber. My vision was blurred, but I managed to contact them and then we planned our escape.”

I put the pen down, trembling as these memories flashed before my mind, fear rushing through me as I had felt it moments before.

A hand touched m back as my dad leans down.

“Is that all?”, he asked, disappointed.

“For now,” I said, rubbing my eyes. “It gets clearer every night.”

He turned the notebook towards him, studying it as he rubbed his greying beard. As he did, I noticed that he was growing as tired as I was these days. His wrinkles had deepened as he grew frailer and frailer, his skin lighter and the bags under his eyes becoming noticeable. I sighed and sank into my chair. Running wasn’t working for us.

“A girl, huh?” I nodded. “Well, She’ll be hard to spot if she dyes her hair like that. The sister, was she blonde?”

“No, or.. Well, I don’t know. My vision is always blurred in that room.”

“Damn,” he sighed. “I hope we know soon.” He glanced at his watch, then patted my shoulder. “We gotta go, son.”

“Ugh....” I groaned as I sat up. I stretched for a moment, sticking my arms high in the air and spreading my weary legs out. After I felt a little more awake, I took one of my two sets of clothes and headed for the nasty motel shower that I had used the night before.

“No time for that, Gerald.”

“What?”, I groaned.

“You know we have to leave at sunset.”

I sighed and threw the tearing clothes into the raggedy bag. Then I collected my noteboo and pen, placing them into the secret part of the backpack I had discovered not a year ago in high school.

Before zipping the bag closed, I reached into the bottom of it and pulled out a pictures in a cracked frame, all that I had left of the life I once led.

In it, the love of my life sat happily in a swingset that we had played on as children. Her white teeth smiling in the bright sunlight of the cold december morning. Her neck was wrapped in a burgundy scarf. Even though it was a cheap camera, it still picked up the snow that was falling around us and landing on her black leather jacket she had bought the day before. Her jeans were dark as always as was her shirt. Even knowing now what she was, what she hid under that scarf and waht monster lied in wait behind those beautiful blue eyes, I couldn’t help but love what I had known her as.


I looked up and saw him standing at the door with his bag, looking like an old, lonely, hitchhiker.

“Yeah, dad, I’m coming.” I said as I threw the picture back in and zipped up the bag. I got up and walked past him as he scanned the room, knowing that he was just doing his usual check. A few months back, I would have called him crazy. Not so much now.

We walked out of the room and down the hallway with cracked hallways and blue doors with peeling paint. I heard a deep, raspy voice groaning in pleasure as we walked by one door and a fight as we walked past the next.

As we left the hallway and went into the lobby, the receptionist noticed us coming and smiled. She was a cute, seemingly nice, young girl with brown hair and green eyes.

My dad stepped towards the counter. “Hey, how are you?”, He said.

She looked up and smiled, then looked me over, caught my eye, and smiled. “I’m doing great! How can I help you?” She said cheerfully, still holding me in her gaze. I smiled weakly, faltering under her gaze.

My dad stepped in front of me, blocking her line of sight. “We just need to check out.”

“Don’t wanna stay around a little longer?”, she asked, her voice lowering. She suddenly seemed a lot cuter. She tried to smile around him, but my dad stepped in front of her.

“Not at all. Here’s a hundred. that should cover it. Keep the change.”

She took the money, seeming shocked and disappointed. “Um, have a good night I guess.”

“We will.” He said as he turned on his heel, heading for the door. “Come on, Gerald. We have to go.”

I shrugged back at her, then turned and walked out. When I caught back up with him, he was throwing his bag in the back of the jeep and opening the driver side door. “Hey!” I yelled. “What the hell was that? She was hot!”

He got in and I jumped in the passenger side. After he buckled he calmly breathed out, then turned on the jeep. “You didn’t see the scar?”


He sighed. “I didn’t think so. Even after all that’s happened to you, you still can’t see a succubus when you meet one?”

“S***, you don’t mean...”

He slammed the Jeep in reverse and started to pull out into the road. “Yes, Gerald, I mean a succubus. If you had listened to her any more she would have drawn you in and killed you.” He slammed on the gas and we took off onto the deserted two lane road. “This is why I’m here. I can see the things you haven’t grown enough to see yet. You have to be careful, Gerald. What you know or do not know could change the tide for us all.”

I hung my head, defeated. “I’m sorry,” I said feebly. Had I really gotten so close to being trapped again?

My dad sighed. “It’s ok, I guess. You’re still learning.” He paused for a moment. “You don’t understand how important you are. You just have to listen, obey, and be watchful. Now sleep. There’s a long trip ahead and who knows? That dream may get more clear.”

I silently covered up in the blanket, thinking about the past and just wishing it would all just go away. For an hour or so, I watched as the flat land gave way to hills, and then mountains as we left California. For a few minutes I watched the rocks fly by as I fell asleep.

The author's comments:
Chapter 1 of a story I am writing.

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