Escaping Fate Once More | Teen Ink

Escaping Fate Once More

May 14, 2016
By Anonymous

Nurses push past and rush down the hall as alarms blast from a distant room. I step aside to let them pass. People are yelling and shouting but I ignore their cries for help. I can’t help them. I can’t help anyone, not even myself. However, to help my curiosity I follow the nurses down the hall and around the corner. As I approach the room filled with chaos, I notice a middle aged man lying in the bed, not moving.  In the corner of the room there was a woman and three children huddled together. All of them had tears running down their cheeks and they  looked terrified. The nurses stop rushing around as soon as the heart monitor flat lined. They knew he was gone. The woman in the corner runs past and throws herself on the man, sobbing onto his hospital gown. He died right there in front of me. I guess I see a lot of death living in a hospital, but every time it still stuns me for awhile. Death is a weird concept. I have technically died before, well... my heart stopped for three minutes but they revived me. I have died just like this guy but he’s gone and never coming back. At least I came back. Although the doctors tell me with my weak heart I won’t be living much longer.

“Jay!” I hear my nurse shout from the end of the hall way. “You got to come eat something to keep your energy up.”
“I’ll be there in a minute.” I shout back down the hall. Although I answered her she still walked down the hall closer towards me.
As she approaches she continues, “Come on, it's time to eat lunch. Leave the man alone, he wasn’t expected to live much longer anyways.”
“Why not?”
“You know that I can’t tell you that for confidential reasons.”
“Yeah but that doesn't make me any less curious.” I mumble under my breath as we walk back to my room. Instead of being in my room for lunch I like to eat on the bench right across the hall.  As I am sitting on this bench eating my ham and cheese sandwich that was made by the hospital cafeteria a boy approaches me. I have never seen him in my life and he looks a few years older than me.
“Hi, my name is Simon.” the strang older boy held out his hand motioning for me to shake it.
“Hey” I respond. I usually don’t talk to other people in the hospital but I’m feeling adventurous. “I’m Jay.”
“So Jay how has your day been?“ Simon continues the conversation.
“It been like the other 700 or so that i’ve spent here, boring, cold, plain and there is a lot of sickness and death.” I bluntly tell him.
“Oh, you’ve been here long then?”
“Yes almost two years now, I have a serious heart condition and they think it’s best if I stay in the hospital in case of an emergency.”
“Oh” Simon apologized and he eventually changed the subject. “Well I have only been here for a few weeks. I’m usually on the third floor so that is probably why we haven’t seen each other before. I found out that I have a brain tumor the size of a large golf ball in my brain and the doctors say they can’t remove it without killing me, so I guess I am here to live out the rest of my days tied up to machines.” Simon careless told me. 
“That is awful. I am terribly sorry. Is there seriously nothing they can do to give you anymore time?” I respond.
“Not really, they say staying here in the hospital with the meds and machines might prolong my life a few months but I am going to die soon no matter what.”
“That must be rough to hear?”
“Not really, I have sort of come to terms with it.”
“Well I doubt this will make you feel better but I am sort of in the same boat as you. One day, probably soon, my heart will give out and they won’t be able to bring me back. So I understand the being scared of knowing you are going to die. I need a heart transplant they say but I mostly likely won’t find any compatibility with anyone. So i’m like you, stuck in this place until my time comes.”
“ Oh Jay, I am very sorry to hear that and I’m very sorry to leave so soon but I have to go back to my room now. Nice meeting you Jay. Hopefully we will meet again” he pats me on the shoulder and starts walking towards the elevator. “Good luck finding a donor!” Simon yelled as he walked down the hallway.
I find it odd that Simon left so suddenly but other than that he seems like a decent guy. It was also odd that he randomly came up and talked to me, maybe he was trying to be friendly. I don’t think much about it as I walk back to my room. I lay down in my bed and ended up falling asleep for a few hours. I woke up and it happened to be a little after dinner time so I walk to the cafeteria to get some food. When i’m there I see Simon again. He comes running up to me seeming excited about something.
“Hey, Jay so I was thinking about it a little and I wanted to donate my heart to you. You can have my heart.” Simon told me.
“Simon that’s super nice of you to offer but I can’t take your heart.”
“Sure you can!”
“No. Really.  I couldn’t ever think about doing that. You realize you wouldn’t survive the surgery.”
“Yes. I understand that I wouldn’t have a heart anymore and that’s okay. I’m gonna die soon anyways and I think it would be great if I could save your life instead of wasting my heart which is perfectly healthy.”
“Seriously Simon I don’t think it’s gonna happen. It doesn’t work that way. Firstly, we probably aren’t a match for blood types. Secondly, usually donated hearts are from people who are already dead.”
“Jay. I am already dead. I have nothing to live for. I have another few months in this hospital than i’m done, gone forever. Why not give you my heart in the process?”
“That so crazy!!”
“Just think about it.”
“Don’t you have cancer? If you did give me your heart wouldn’t I end up dying from cancer cells?”
“The cancer is in my brain. It hasn’t effected my heart. Of course the doctors are gonna have to check that and make sure it’s safe or still even possible but I think it will work.”
“Simon you are crazy. You just met me and you want to die so you can give me your heart?”
“Exactly.”
“Dude, i’m gonna have to talk to my parents and doctors. Oh my god, no, this is insane.”
“Talk to them and get back to me and tell me what they think.” Simon said and walked away. He seemed very excited to donate his heart to me. I’m still not sure really why. I brought it up to my mom and she was so happy and filled with joy that I finally had a donor. She didn’t seem to care that he was basically killing himself to save me. I asked my doctors about the cancer aspect and they said there was only a very slight chance that I would get cancer from his transplanted heart.  I went further and was curious about whether we matched so I asked them to test us. The test results came in and we are an exact match. It is almost scary how everything could work out so well. I made them double test the blood and the results were conclusive. We matched and I could take Simons healthy heart if I wanted to. It just all seemed a little off and weird to me.

I found Simon on the third floor later that night. I told him about how we were perfect matches and how the doctors said the cancer probably wouldn’t affect me. He seemed generally happy to offer me his heart. I think I was starting to come around to the idea. We talked for a few hours about our lives and just everything in general. I feel like I should at least get the pleasure of knowing who I might take a heart from. As the day turned to night I started to wrap things up with Simon.
“So we are actually doing this?” I ask him. “Are you positive that you want to give me your heart?”
“Yes. I am 100% positive, this is happening and you are gonna have a full fun life ahead of you.” he said with a smile on his face, he was very willing to die to save me.

I am lying on the hard surgery table waiting for them to put me under. I look up at the blank ceiling and the dim hospital lights that are staring right back at me. Yesterday I met my future. I met Simon and he decided to make a miracle happen.  I finally found a donor. Everything will be perfectly fine now. I will get the transplant and I can return to school and my life. I am super thankful that I meet Simon and that he offered his heart to me. I still find it strange how I meet Simon and he offered me his heart and that he happened to be a perfect match. The doctors reassured me that it is very unlike his heart will pass the cancer cells to me. They said since Simon has a brain tumor and it doesn’t effect his heart I will most likely be fine. However there is a small chance that I develop cancer but I think it’s worth the risk. I either don’t take Simon’s heart and we both die very soon or I can take his heart and have the chance to live thanks to Simon. I think there are more pros than cons to the transplant.
“Are you ready Jay?” one of the doctors asks me.
“As ready as i'm ever gonna be.”
“Okay I would like you to count backwards from one-hundred.”
“Okay. One-Hundred. Ninety-Nine. Ninety-Eight. Ninety Seven. Ninety-Si....” I trail off into a quiet sleep. I don’t know how the surgery is going or if it is even happening. I’m out like a light.

The early sun shining in my room wakes me. My mom is sleeping in the chair beside my bed. I try to move but I can’t. I try to say something to my mom but no words come out. I’m freaking out a little bit, maybe the surgery didn’t go as planned and i’m paralyzed forever. Suddenly my body moves. I stand up and start walking out into the hallway. The strange thing is, I am not moving. I didn’t want to get up and I didn’t want to walk anywhere. However something is making my body move. My body seems to be heading towards the door. I seem to be leaving the hospital. Why would I leave the hospital so soon after my surgery? Why can’t I control my body? I can’t even do anything to stop myself. I am in full panic mode now. I leave the hospital and just wait outside in the open court yard. A very attractive woman seems to be heading directly towards me. Something forces my body to turn slightly towards her.
“I see you finally took over a new body.” she said as she stopped next to me.
“Yes, however he is still here with me but his presence is dying as we speak. He won’t be awake much longer.” that sounded like my voice but I wasn’t the one talking. I didn’t say those words nor was I moving my body. It’s strange but I have no control over my body or my actions. It is like someone is taking my body for a ride and I am observing them use my body. All I can do is listen and watch.
“Well now that you’ve taken a new body and the host is almost expelled we can leave, right?” the woman said to me. Taken whose body? My body? I am frightened about what is happening to me. Who is this woman and why is she talking weirdly? I have so many questions but I can’t ask any of them.
“Yes we can leave now. I have full control over this body.” again my voice but not me. I’m scared to death. Wait, I can’t go anywhere. Where am I going? What about my family? I don’t want to go anywhere but I am being taken over and I can’t do anything to stop it. I feel like I am fading away into the distance. I can hear faint muffled sounds coming from the woman's mouth and she is becoming very blurry. I feel like I am going into nothingness.
“We can go home. Simon, we can finally go home now.” the woman said as she grabbed my hand but it wasn’t my hand anymore and she knew that.



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