Breakup Letter | Teen Ink

Breakup Letter MAG

December 6, 2008
By Fuocotanzer PLATINUM, Jacksonville, Florida
Fuocotanzer PLATINUM, Jacksonville, Florida
27 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested"


Dear Windows Internet Explorer,

Our relationship has been strained for a long time. Of course, it’s not all your fault, nor is it all mine. Our intermediary is also to blame: my hated Gateway (insert string of numbers hidden somewhere on the computer’s body, necessary for purchase of any software) PC, which runs far too slowly and far too aggravatingly. But that does not get you off the hook.

You see, Windows Internet Explorer, I can no longer deal with your ridiculous loading time. Sure, at one time I found it attractive – even sexy – for my browser to take ages to log in or load a webpage. But not anymore. My life is fuller than it was, and I don’t have time for you to semi-load and then stop.

Also, as much as I loved it when we got together, your refusal to log me in to some of my necessary accounts, such as e-mail and MySpace, has become a problem. It was unfair of you, and I should not have submitted to your cruelty and mistreatment.

A third reason for my leaving you may seem mean: you are simply far too sickly. You are constantly contracting new viruses, and your immune system is terrible. I don’t have the time or the money to care for you anymore. It may seem unfair, but you will have to survive on your own. I cannot keep healing you, going through and finding all your corrupted files, cleansing our intermediary’s system because you have given it some virus, bug, or spyware. It takes far too much time and energy, which I do not have.

Windows Internet Explorer, you did wonderful things for me that, at the time, no other could do. But, my dear, times have changed, and while you have too, you have not changed enough. I am 16 now, nearly a grown woman, and I cannot tolerate your childish ways. As much as I once cared about you, I fear that the time has come for us to part.

Your former friend,
(I’m sorry, but it seems I’ve forgotten the rest.)

P.S. When I clicked on you, then selected “uninstall,” I meant that I never wanted to see you again. I wanted you off my PC. I didn’t mean “create five new shortcuts.”

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This article has 232 comments.

on May. 20 2009 at 4:12 pm
darkatheart14 BRONZE, Idaho Falls, Idaho
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment
amazing and a half!

you broke his heart lol

Yessy(: SILVER said...
on May. 12 2009 at 5:06 pm
Yessy(: SILVER, Compton, California
5 articles 0 photos 7 comments
Haha. I remember reading this article. :) lol. It is oh so very true how a lot of ppl, teens especially, tend to get addicted to all these websites now and days. =) lol. Great article! Love it. Keep up the good work! (:

PenInHand GOLD said...
on May. 6 2009 at 4:47 pm
PenInHand GOLD, Fayetteville, North Carolina
12 articles 0 photos 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
" Kemps!"

Hahahahahaha!! LMBO! Very creative, and I too, have felt this way before, which makes it all teh more funny!

katie101 said...
on Apr. 18 2009 at 1:14 am
katie101, Hueytown, Alabama
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments
ha i loved it(: It was funny(:

Bex24 BRONZE said...
on Mar. 29 2009 at 6:24 am
Bex24 BRONZE, Toronto, Other
3 articles 21 photos 79 comments
Haha, that was lovely. Keep it up :)

on Mar. 28 2009 at 9:57 pm
Steffnee BRONZE, Kittanning, Pennsylvania
3 articles 2 photos 2 comments
I loved this! (: It was cute and entertaining. Keep writing. :D

KaylaAnne GOLD said...
on Mar. 27 2009 at 1:11 am
KaylaAnne GOLD, North Platte, Nebraska
16 articles 0 photos 42 comments
That was really good. Inspiring! You should wright more! Very entertaining. Check out some of my work and tell me what you think ... please!

on Mar. 17 2009 at 5:41 am
Wordpainter BRONZE, Washougal, Washington
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
This is adoration: not a religious exercise, but an attitude of the soul~Evelyn Underhill
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the flower leaves on the heel of the one who crushed it~Mark Twain
Power can do by gentleness what violence fails to accomplish

very entertaining!!! I love it!

on Mar. 16 2009 at 2:52 pm
knightkristin SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
7 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” - Dr. Seuss

That is amazing. [:

on Mar. 2 2009 at 11:35 pm
AnAuthenticAuthor2B BRONZE, Idaho Falls, Idaho
2 articles 0 photos 7 comments
Ha, I loved it! I wish computers could read and understand, because I would want to send them half a dozen of those letters! Great creativity!

tweedle dee said...
on Mar. 2 2009 at 2:08 am
ha ha funny!