it will never get easier. watching somebody you’d take a bullet for, somebody that you gave the whole world, your whole heart to, watch them choose somebody else. you know you can’t have them, but the feeling is still there, never leaving, clinging like twining vines on a flower. the feeling of want turns to the feeling of jealousy. completely submerged. i would do anything to be with my somebody. to be with my best-friend, but at the same time, he’d do anything to be with her. his somebody. what really does hurt the most, is when i know that we’ll never be more than this. what really does hurt the most, is when i think about you every free moment of mine, and you probably haven't thought about me once. what really does hurt the most, is when i realize you don’t know that i have fallen down to the floor my face drowned in salty tears, screaming, “oh my god, he kissed her. no. no. no.” too many times, this week. what really does hurt the most, is when i sit here wanting you to wipe away my tears. what really does hurt the most, is when i know that you’ll never read this. what really does hurt the most, is when i admit that you’ll never know how much i really do love you. but if you’re happy, i’m happy, right?