All Nonfiction
- Bullying
- Books
- Academic
- Author Interviews
- Celebrity interviews
- College Articles
- College Essays
- Educator of the Year
- Heroes
- Interviews
- Memoir
- Personal Experience
- Sports
- Travel & Culture
All Opinions
- Bullying
- Current Events / Politics
- Discrimination
- Drugs / Alcohol / Smoking
- Entertainment / Celebrities
- Environment
- Love / Relationships
- Movies / Music / TV
- Pop Culture / Trends
- School / College
- Social Issues / Civics
- Spirituality / Religion
- Sports / Hobbies
All Hot Topics
- Bullying
- Community Service
- Environment
- Health
- Letters to the Editor
- Pride & Prejudice
- What Matters
- Back
Summer Guide
- Program Links
- Program Reviews
- Back
College Guide
- College Links
- College Reviews
- College Essays
- College Articles
- Back
When I get there first
When I get there before you do
First of all
You must adopt 12 dogs and 11 cats and let them loose in a furniture store
You must go cliff diving
You must go skydiving
You must buy 4 pigs and paint the numbers 1,2,3 and 5 and let them loose in a Walmart
You must buy all the shaving cream in a Target and claim it’s for your very hairy son
You must sell all 5 of your kidneys on the black market. If you don’t have that many then get some more
You must predict that the Queen will die tomorrow then make sure that you are correct
You must get a level 10 spray tan
You must catch a flounder with a leopard print t shirt and eat it raw
You must dye your hair shimp tan (all of it)
You must change your name to Eshlong Munsk
You must become a pro golfer
You must star as Kowalski in a live action Penguins of Madagascar movie directed by you.
You must be 6’3 or taller
You must learn to read Sanskrit, Hebru and/or Alabamian
Just kidding
When I’m gone before you I’m 100% going to heaven. I don’t know about you but I’m pretty sure
We went through so much craziness
I think that you should experience that one more time
It’s never too late to live a little
Right?
Age is just a number
When I’m gone before you I just want you to live a good life (with a special someone whose name I will not disclose)
When I’m gone just remember this
I will always and forever be 10x cooler than you
Also, burn this
Similar Articles
JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 0 comments.