It is simply impossible to force yourself to forget your past.

Why is it that flashbacks just hit you out of nowhere?

Like the sound of the gunshots going off on the bloodcurdling battlefield.

Why is it that whenever I lay in my bed,

I think of the rock hard mattresses in the pitch black military bases.

Why is it that when I hear someone cry,

I think of the cries of my fellow soldiers covered in thick mud wounded in despair. 

Why is it that when I get ready for work, I put my boots on and think of dirty workboots covered in blood, sweat, and tears that step over the lifeless bodies that lay on the grass.

Why is it that when I go to the gym and feel my heart rate going up, I think of the uneasy feeling when I saw a large bullet bolting straight toward my chest. 

Or when I feel lightheaded and my mind goes straight to when I look down at my stomach and see the maroon color dripping down my legs and covering my hands.

It always makes me wonder,

Is the world ever going to reach complete peace?

Hopefully, so I can wake up from this bad dream

and forget the past.

This nightmare has carved itself into my heart, into my veins, and left scars scattered all over my body.

That’s when I remembered, it is simply impossible to force yourself to forget your past.