Along the Way | Teen Ink

Along the Way MAG

November 29, 2008
By Andrew Dobies GOLD, Long Grove, Illinois
Andrew Dobies GOLD, Long Grove, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 2 comments

How many faces and birthdays will I come to remember
before my eyes shut for the last time
and I find myself in that closet I hid in that smelled of laundry softener
in the third grade because I didn’t belong in a girl’s house?
How many fingers and palms and fingernails
will I see amid how many trees, swinging green and happy branches in the spring
like the clasped hands of middle aged lovers who left the kids at home with a babysitter
so they could go for an afternoon walk?
I imagine there will be enough smiles and enough tears
that if I wanted to I could flood the city of New York
and swim through those blurred lights in the dead of an August night
and sing along with the crickets and the distorted sound of drowned car horns.
Hopefully I’ll have a bag of forehead wrinkles and boxes full of voices
from teachers and friends and train conductors
who say the most unimportant things like “May I see your ticket?”
Hopefully there will be shoes and coats from parties
and sloppy kisses on doorsteps in cold January nights
where my breath will be visible in the air and the ice near my feet
will sparkle and gleam in the periodic flicker of the dying bulb
in her porch light.
Even if things go wrong,
at least there will be the smell of honeysuckle and sweat
in my mother’s hair as she held me to her chest as I came fresh from the womb
and there will always be those fluorescent lights.



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This article has 216 comments.


on May. 31 2010 at 4:28 pm
krazykelsey BRONZE, Janesville, Wisconsin
3 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love is a work in progress for the rest of you life

i love the way you worded everything its very beautiful. you can see it in your mind. keep writing its your amazing at it.

on May. 31 2010 at 1:32 pm
EllieMae SILVER, Severna Park, Maryland
6 articles 0 photos 8 comments
Very moving, great imagery too. It holds a very nice message.

on May. 31 2010 at 9:29 am
DepartedxDestinies GOLD, Pottstown, Pennsylvania
15 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Que sera, sera (What will be, will be)

I'm new here so I haven't read alot of poetry yet but this is a really good poem atone point in it though it sounded as if you were at a loss for words. But other then nthat it was extremely beautiful I applaud you.

AbbyQ said...
on May. 31 2010 at 3:19 am
I love the line breaks. They add charm and meaning to the peice, and make it seem more hontest than the word choice etc. already do.

on May. 12 2010 at 8:12 pm
karen_xo PLATINUM, West Chester, Pennsylvania
48 articles 7 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Inspiration exists, but it has to find us working."
— Pablo Picasso

You, sir, are truly talented. I have been on Teen Ink for well over a year, and it's safe to say that this is the best poem I have seen yet. The beauty of your words and their elegant imagery leave me breathless. I can't wait to check out your other work!

on May. 9 2010 at 7:53 pm
musiclover114 SILVER, Woodstock, Georgia
7 articles 0 photos 82 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

born an original, why die a copy?

omg this was amazing!!!!!!! i gave you five stars too!!!!!!! its so true and deep.I love the way anyone can relate to it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please continue writing!!!!!!!!!!

 


Shahed GOLD said...
on May. 9 2010 at 3:26 pm
Shahed GOLD, Tulsa, Oklahoma
16 articles 2 photos 350 comments

Favorite Quote:
"People are like tea bags, they don't realize their own strength until they're dropped in hot water "
“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway."

I read it twice! I gave you 5 stars, its hard to pick fav. lines, over all its amazing! its remarkable! Alot of metaphors which gave it interest while reading!

Check out my work, I would love to read your comments! and I must say this is really nice!


dianaforfree said...
on May. 9 2010 at 2:43 pm

Such truth, this speaks. It's lovely and raw and kind, yet true true true. You're wonderful.

Please do check out some of my own work; it's only just posted and any feedback would be fantastic. Thank you! (:


on May. 9 2010 at 2:40 pm
Snowflake23b SILVER, Colorado Springs, Colorado
5 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"Everyone wants to go to heaven, but No one wants to Die"
~ Not written by Me

That had to be one of the best things I have ever read! I am purely amazed.

on May. 9 2010 at 10:58 am
decembersun14 PLATINUM, Winchester, Massachusetts
24 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life sucks. A lot. But you just have to keep on going. No matter what happens. You can never ever give up. You just have to roll with the punches, go with the flow, and always try your best to keep on going <3"

this is indescribable. i'm speachless. just so amazing! keep writing!

on May. 9 2010 at 10:21 am
shelterisland GOLD, Montclair, New Jersey
14 articles 0 photos 175 comments

Favorite Quote:
-Biting's excellent. It's like kissing only there's a winner."-Doctor Who, The Tardis

WOW this was amazing!!

on May. 9 2010 at 12:28 am
CammyCalliope GOLD, Georgetown, Other
16 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
We are now
part of a garden, that is part of a
landscape, that is part of a world
that no one believes in. (Joshua Beckman)

This is truly remarkable. 

on Apr. 17 2010 at 7:55 pm
CLAIRESCOTT SILVER, Suffolk, Virginia
7 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
i have only ever been in love with a mirror and a beer bottle. - sid vicious

i absolutely adore this.

it reminded me of so many different experiences...you said what i've been wanting to say.


on Apr. 17 2010 at 6:39 pm
LikeToPlayFish GOLD, Omaha, Nebraska
13 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We all fake smiles, just the ones who are true to themselves seem sad."-Niq.

I loved it. just great. please check out some of my work

on Apr. 17 2010 at 6:19 pm
beautifulworld SILVER, Memphis, Tennessee
9 articles 0 photos 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
What's the point i wearing my favorite rocket ship underpants if no one asks to see them? -Calvin and Hobbes

i love the metaphors and wordplay here. it has such a nice rhythm to it too. <3

on Apr. 17 2010 at 1:05 pm
i love your poem its sweet and vary nice

on Apr. 17 2010 at 12:47 pm
xBaByGiRrL22x PLATINUM, Pearl River, New York
22 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The goal isn't to live forever, but create something that will."
"If you wanna go, baby let's go; if you wanna rock, I'm ready to roll.''
"No one ever said it'd be easy. They just said it'd be worth it." <3

awe this is amazing! gr8 job. plz keep writingg

Eilatan GOLD said...
on Apr. 17 2010 at 9:53 am
Eilatan GOLD, Old Greenwich, Connecticut
11 articles 1 photo 307 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nobody is normal. Everybody in the world is a weirdo freak. Except you, which makes you a weirdo freak."

oh my goodness, this is so amazing! i love all the little descriptions and you use metaphors so nicely, i want to capture my life in a poem just like this. this is amazing.

on Mar. 26 2010 at 8:23 pm
firstsnowfalls DIAMOND, Marcellus, New York
51 articles 6 photos 105 comments
nice job. i like it :)

on Mar. 26 2010 at 12:00 pm
munkyman95 GOLD, Medway, Other
18 articles 1 photo 100 comments

Favorite Quote:
I will become, what I know I am' Michael Jordan

Its free verse so its kinda meant to be like this... a little ranting... but with a great concept :)