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A man, now MAG
May 15, 2014
Blades and slits
and grimy bits
They told me
to let you
fall
Leaving slow to
let you know that
lingering is
acce
pt
a
bl
e
Weariness
and pale white fist
and crimson
kiss'd
now
I'm a man
A man, but
what have
I done
strong like
a
man, if I have
no soul?
© Andrew M., Apple Valley, MN
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 18 comments.
EmilytheBelleofA. DIAMOND said...
on Aug. 2 2014 at 10:20 am
This is also, very DESCRIPTIVE and AMAZINGLY written. The words in your poem is woven, so well. Your poem is also powerful. Thank you for sharing this!
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on Jul. 28 2014 at 3:28 am
THANK YOU AHHH YOUR WORK IS AMAZING I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE COMMENTING this is such an honor thank you
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on Jul. 28 2014 at 3:28 am
thank you thank you! i feel so honored thank you
This is unbelievable. Definitely going in my favorite list, which is a list of solely elite poems. I love the structure (yes, I'm one of those people who look at the structure; I'm a very visual person). I relish the rhetorical question at the end; a question I ask myself just about every living day in my life. I enjoy the simplicty of the emotion carried throughout the poem; or so it seems simple to the simple-minded. However, I see and find someone almost at war with himself, lost in his consciousness, wandering around the labrynth of Life. I really like how it rolls off the tongue; there's rhyme and rhythm—subtle—but it's there. Really well done. Write more stuff like this.
I cannot find words to describe this poem! I'm speechless! It was so incredibly deep and powerful. I loved it when you ended up with a fake question cuz actually the answer is quiet obvious so it's kinda a doubt, right? Anyways! Defenitly 5 satrs :D carry on just like that and you'll soon reach the highest tops ;)
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on Jul. 27 2014 at 1:19 am
thanks so much ahhh this means a lot
spiritwriter GOLD said...
on Jul. 22 2014 at 7:25 pm
great poem: DEFINITELY needs a trigger warning though!
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on Jul. 20 2014 at 5:19 pm
Thanks so much!
Ariel_Fluffyy SILVER said...
on Jul. 12 2014 at 4:17 pm
This a very AWESOME piece!
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on Jun. 21 2014 at 2:30 am
thank you! means a lot.
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on May. 31 2014 at 10:39 pm
lol sheefo thanks
Prestidigitation said...
on May. 26 2014 at 12:54 am
Wow this is surprisingly deep 4u dude 8^D I really liked the line(s) "strong like a man, if I have no soul?" zomg
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on May. 21 2014 at 7:22 pm
thanks! :)
nithyaswaminathan BRONZE said...
on May. 19 2014 at 6:44 pm
thank you so much
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