Inadequate | Teen Ink

Inadequate

January 20, 2015
By AprilNicoleJones BRONZE, New Castle, Indiana
AprilNicoleJones BRONZE, New Castle, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I write only because
there is a voice within me
that will not be still."
~ SYLVIA PLATH

(MY FORMER ACCOUNTS: Icantwrite & Punk.Snowflake)
Published poems from my former accounts:
- FRAIL HOPE (Icantwrite)
- YOURSELF (Punk.Snowflake)


I am coal dust

where society demands

only diamonds.



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This article has 8 comments.


Mckay ELITE said...
on Feb. 16 2015 at 9:01 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

You describe society with its unrealistic obsession for perfection flawlessly. Captivating from start to finish. This haiku proves the power that the haiku genre is capable of.

on Feb. 16 2015 at 4:31 am
Allen. PLATINUM, Palo Alto, California
32 articles 9 photos 525 comments

Favorite Quote:
[i]No matter how much people try to put you down or make you think other things about yourself, the only person you can trust about who you really are is you[/i] -Crusher-P

You have this perfectly written. I've never seen a poem only one sentence long that so perfectly captured such emotion and talent. 5 stars.

KaavyaM SILVER said...
on Feb. 6 2015 at 6:37 pm
KaavyaM SILVER, Hyderabad, Other
9 articles 1 photo 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

I'm not a fan of 3-lined poems, but you've really, really nailed it here. You've stunned me in just a few words, because the metaphor and words you've used are so powerful.

on Feb. 4 2015 at 7:53 pm
L_DepthsofDespair, Bamaha, California
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.

Will Smith

Your writing is truly compelling. Those three lines above were eloquent and contained so much connotation.

on Jan. 28 2015 at 8:40 pm
SpidersAcrossStars PLATINUM, Hayward, California
36 articles 0 photos 160 comments

Favorite Quote:
For you, a thousand times over.

5/5 simply beautiful. amazing metaphor. it says so much in so few words. i love it. great job :))

on Jan. 27 2015 at 5:30 pm
AbigailGilgal GOLD, Cloquet, Minnesota
12 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I write for the same reason I breath- because if I didn't, I would die"
~Isaac Asimov

"There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at the typewriter and bleed."
~ Ernest Hemingway

Whoa. Mind. Blown. The first thing I though when I looked at this was that it was like three lines and it would be dumb. Then I read those three lines. Amazing. If you can say something that powerful in nine words, you obviously have skill. Love it.

on Jan. 26 2015 at 6:10 pm
teacuppoetry GOLD, Lancashire, Other
15 articles 1 photo 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes- Sherlock Holmes

Very very short but has a lot of substance to it as well which is an essential balance for this type of poetry. I am in no way an expert but I feel that is what feels right :)

on Jan. 26 2015 at 4:28 pm
CaseyChickenWang SILVER, McDonough,
7 articles 2 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
"No one likes half-jinglers! Jingle all the way!" - Shelley McNeight
"You don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate." - GSUMUN

It's concise yet very meaningful. There's a lot of truth in it, and I'm searching for critique here but I can't think of any :) After all, you did receive Editor's choice! Good job, keep up the great work. I'd like to read more of your poems.