Breakup Advice | Teen Ink

Breakup Advice

September 24, 2009
By Anonymous

After those amazing relationships end, you have to ask yourself how things will continue. If you broke up with your partner, you must either be unhappy with them, mad at them, tired of them, or some other circumstance. So, if it is you who breaks up with the other, stop and think. As one single person, you don't have any idea what the other might go through. One moment to you is completely different that that of another. For example, you might go on a date and have the time of your life, oblivious to that fact that the one you care for is about to slit their wrists in boredom.
Just and example.
But that is something that you can relate to a breakup. You might think that things are better off without the other. They might be tripping and falling behind you, trying to catch up and get you back. It happens a lot, and these breakups are the worst. I myself went through one. And I've scraped my knees so much over these past to years tripping and falling after her(yes, two years. She's so beautiful I can't stop thinking about her). I've found out the the first and most important thing you can do to stay out of those horrible, bad break ups, is to forget. Easier said then done, right? Well, there is only one way to completely get over such a thing. Overwrite the memories that the two of you shared. Now, people call this a rebound, but isn't every boyfriend/girlfriend after the first a rebound? You must make better memories with this person. Have a greater time, and think about the new things you share rather then all the things you used to share with the other. Take it from me, with time, almost everything is mendable.


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This article has 472 comments.


on Oct. 14 2009 at 2:01 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

Yea, sometimes it's that final shove that makes things easy. Its hard, but its for the best. And i'll make sure to check it out. thank you

on Oct. 14 2009 at 11:48 am
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

btw, one of my poems was finally approved, pleaseeee read!!!! and comment por favor!!! :) gracias

on Oct. 14 2009 at 11:47 am
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

no problem. thanks for listening. nobody does that for me, so it was very nice to have a STRANGER do it lol. so thank you.

i also am moving on now. todayi started going out with this boy. i have known him for awhile and it was spurr of the moment kind of thing. i just asked him out. my inspiration being what Jose said last night. things that shocked me, ripped me completely but also made me realize he isnt worth it. so the complete heartbreak was good in a way, even though it hurt.

on Oct. 14 2009 at 10:36 am
Westie_candies2012 BRONZE, Metamora, Michigan
3 articles 2 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your gonna get." Forest gump

Im like bella in eclipse. torn between jacob and edward but me and my boyfriend broke up and i found a guy to stitch my heart back together.but when edward(jake...my bf) came back i lost my friend that had stitched me back up :(

on Oct. 13 2009 at 2:21 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

most definitely :)

on Oct. 13 2009 at 2:19 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

feels wonderful, doesn't it? it's quite healthy. i found that out a long time ago ahah. But truthfully, i'm still very sorry for you. I didn't do nearly as much as the two of you did, but then again i'm glad i didn't. Bc then i'd just be falling back for her even more. Thanks for sharing :)

on Oct. 13 2009 at 2:07 pm
A_writers_Beauty SILVER, Hanover, Massachusetts
9 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Woman and cats do whatever they want, men and dogs should get used to it."

"Me and Jacob Black would like to La Push Bella Swan of a cliff."

I agree. I don't think that someone should hate the person they break up with. I think it's just rude. so what if the relationship didn't work out right. u can still be friends =)

on Oct. 10 2009 at 6:53 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

okay. this one's a doozie, so watch out! (YOU'VE BEEN WARNED)<br />
Well, this began my 7th grade year and lasted till halfway into my 8th grade. The background info is, I never really noticed her because i thought she would never notice me and i didn't worry about it. But then one of my friends, who was also friends with her, told me that she liked me. Of course then, i was like, "That's a horrible joke," and they just laughed and said "no, really!". Then i went home thought it over, and eventually, a few weeks after that, we were together. She was great. She was shy to the point of not being clingy, but i still couldn't help holding her. She was my first kiss. I was hers. I waited 2 whole months just to take her on our annual band ski trip. I was a firm believer in symbolism, and winter and skiing was and still is one of my favorite things. So we kissed on a ski lift. Classic. I almost missed the first one, and the second was perfect. We went to everything together. All the way up to the school year. Except for one problem. She was a year older than me.<br />
She left for highschool and i had to suffice by seeing her once a day in the morning and talking to her on the phone. Now we also had a joke, that there was a guy in highschool (a junior, no less) that liked her. She told me she'd never think of dating him, and i believed that. So the school year went on, and about september she told me things were getting hard and we took a week break. We caught back up and things were better than ever. The last, best thing we had together was when we went to a local haunted mansion-type park. I held her close the whole night, keeping each other warm. She seemed happy. But then i noticed that she didn't quite seem all there.<br />
I'd call her and she'd have to leave early. I'd ask her if she wanted to come over, and she would make excuses, mumble or something. I wasn't that stupid of a kid back then. Something was up. So i prepared for it, fearing for the worst. Then, on Nov. 23 (btw, 23 was our number. It was the date of my bday *august 23* and we had a inner joke about how 23 showed up EVERYWHERE) she called me while i was with my friend patrick. we were in the kitchen and she called. I can't remember if she was crying or not...she was a strong girl. but she said that things were over (not that harshly). But she never gave a reason.<br />
She never gave a reason...<br />
I shrugged it off and told him "lets go play some bball!" and that was the end of it until he left. But i was already building it up all inside me. By December, it was a cage ready to explode. I dated another girl to see if things were better. Things didn't end up well, although we had good times till then. We're still friends, but there wasn't much friendship right after...i was still constantly thinking about her, and i had yet to get a reason! finally, i gathered by balls in my right hand and asked her. She told me she hadn't told me bc she didn't want me to get mad. I'm the most easy going, understanding person. I would never get mad, as long as i had the truth.<br />
She told me she liked the boy she told me she'd never date, and she had started to like him like, in Oct! She also said that she had liked him before we were dating, but didn't ever think it would work. This of course was the same feelings as if someone had hit me where the sun dont' shine with sledgehammer. OUCH. But i was happy she had told the truth. Since, i've gone through a few gf's, but i recently just got in another, after a year or being single. We'll c if it lives up to the challenge, but i'm having my doubts of that already...sorry for the novel

on Oct. 10 2009 at 9:02 am
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

yeah, i am sorry to hear that. what is your story?? and, from what you have said to me, and how kind you are, what girl wouldnt keep you??? i am actually doing a bit better now. i am sort of getting used to seeing him. i am best friends with his parents, sisters, brothers, the kids his mom watches, his aunts uncles, parents friends.... so i go over his house with either Sabas or Natalie (cause they can drive) basically everyday. i still feel sick to my stomach sitting in the car waiting for him outside of his school, and when he gets in and doesnt say a word to me i am still uncomfortable, but back at his house i feel at home, whether he talks to me or not. i am like an additional sister to their family. i am more in their family than in mine. i feel more at home and relaxed at their house than my own. i am closer to my real culture there ( i am adopted) and i feel like i belong :)

on Oct. 9 2009 at 5:26 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

its good to know that you can keep being friends with someone after your relationship's gone sour. I always try to end on good terms.

on Oct. 9 2009 at 5:24 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

i'm a guy. none taken. i'll be d@mned to care that i'm one of the few sentimental guys out there haha. And no, i'm not gay . definitely NOT gay . but that was what happened with me too, although not exactly. The relationship that i spoke of was my longest, and of course, it hit me the hardest

on Oct. 9 2009 at 1:42 pm
A_writers_Beauty SILVER, Hanover, Massachusetts
9 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Woman and cats do whatever they want, men and dogs should get used to it."

"Me and Jacob Black would like to La Push Bella Swan of a cliff."

No i don't mind. =)

I actually broke up with my boyfriend several... it was either several weeks ago, or a few months ago. Now we were like best friends before, and we still are. I try to stay friends with him. and it's been working out so far!

on Oct. 9 2009 at 12:07 pm
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

8 months. but according to his friends, he got bored with me after 7. now i kno this is a short amount of time but it was my longest relationship. im was so used to 2 or 3 week or 1 month relationship that wen this one lasted, every moment really counted even more than anyone could understand... and thank you! ( u r a guy rightt? no offense.....)

on Oct. 9 2009 at 12:10 am
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

thanks. I appreciate the feedback. one can never know what another thinks haha

on Oct. 9 2009 at 12:10 am
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

thanks! :)

on Oct. 8 2009 at 8:25 pm
Danday123 BRONZE, Tampa, Florida
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You may know the mechanics of how something works, but that does not make it any less of a miracle"
-Bill Compton, Tru Blood

Oh my gosh, this was so sweet, I love this article :) <3

StinelliT said...
on Oct. 8 2009 at 6:05 pm
I thought this was a very discriptive advice and very useful by the way. I like when you used a personal experience stating that "she is so beautiful and I can't stop thinking about her," it showed that you had some personal experience about the topic. I loved how you never directly referd to the reader that it is specifically to a girl, you always said " boyfriend/girlfriend" or "other." I loved this piece and will definatly use the advice. Thanks

on Oct. 8 2009 at 1:55 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

oh honey. well...hmm... all i can say is that you have to keep trying, or sit down and wait for the storm to blow over. It will happen with time. and i'll call you baby for your own sake :D haha. how long did you date him again?

on Oct. 8 2009 at 1:52 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

Thanks! Care to tell your story? i won't mind if you don't want to. That's something personal. It's just interesting to hear how many people we can all relate to.

on Oct. 8 2009 at 12:19 pm
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

trying. very hard. although i have to say, trying to replace the memories is hard because by doing it in the first place, going to certain places, seeing certain things, i cant help but to automatically think of him. at the end of the day my automatic thought is to call him as my fingers are already dialing his number. i do these things unconciously until his voice comes through and i wake up to wat i am doing. i make up an excuse and hang up to try to call someone else who will call me baby. someone else to waste my tears on. so long as it isnt him..