G.E.N | Teen Ink


April 7, 2014
By GhostMatrix SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
GhostMatrix SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
6 articles 3 photos 82 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live Each Day To The Fullest. -Quote From Somewhere Else-

I'm Whatever You Want Me To Be - My Quote -

Chapter 1: White Raindrops

The stream was flowing water down a waterfall, as the sunlight swayed through the trees. A boy was found lying on his back under a tall tree. The boy was woken up by the light when it hit his eyes; he slowly sat up. The boy put his hand on his head, and looked around, nothing seemed familiar to him, as he got to his feet; he muttered the grounds cold. What happened to me? How did I get here? The boy started walking; it was the only thing he could think of. The boy’s eyes seemed blurry as he stumbled over some rocks to get to higher ground. The boy made it up the cliff and saw nothing but forest. He looked up at the grey sky. The boy decides to keep walking until he finds his way out. Night grew near, the boy looked around it was even more confusing at night than during the day. The boy felt something wet hit his head, then his shoulder, then his hand. The boy lifted his head to the sky and it poured down rain. The boy began to run, bushes and tree branches hitting his face. The boy tripped over a tree root but regain his balance. The boy looked around and ran to a building and sat on the stairs. On the side of the building it read: Chicago orphanage. The ceiling light came on and the door opened. A women came out and saw the boy, all soaked and wide eyes. The boy had white hair, white shirt, white shorts; but no shoes, and blue eyes. The women came to him and said come inside. The boy got up slowly and walked inside the building. The place seemed nice and warm. The women got the boy a towel and led him to the kitchen. The women asked do you have a name? The boy never thought about it, cause it came naturally to him. My name is Gen ; he said, that’s the only thing he did remember.
“Gen how old are you? said Nicole”.
“I don’t know, said Gen”.
“Do you know where your parents are? said Nicole”.
“I don’t know, I woke up in the forest. I don’t remember a lot”.
“Well Gen, I’m Nicole Sanders. I run this orphanage”.
“What’s an orphanage? said Gen”.
“It’s a home where you stay and get adopted”.
“I can stay here? said Gen”.
“Nicole said of course”.
“Now, I bet your hungry”.
“I am, said Gen”.
Nicole got a plate full of mash potatoes, chicken, steamed carrots, and a juice box for him to drink. After Gen was finished eating; Nicole told him where he’ll be sleeping, and got him some dry clothes to wear.
“Yea, Gen”.
“What's adopted”?
“Its when we help kids find a family and a home”.
“Gen gave a nod, I understand, It would be nice to have a real family of my own; he said with a smile”.

Chapter 2: The good, the bad, and the scientists

When Doctor Page woke up he was strapped to a chair; his head was throbbing. He looked around; he was in a room with a very dim light, the chair was made of metal which made it very uncomfortable. He saw a door, it was red, and it really stuck out since the room was so dark. After a few minutes he started hearing noises coming from behind the door, he was still a little groggy, but he was able to clarify the noise as voices; he listened carefully, to understand what they were saying. Sir what methods should we use. A deep shady voice answered with two words, Extreme-measures. The door opened slowly, the Doctor flinched cause of the bright light shinning in his eyes, and then it was dim again. The Doctor heard footsteps, slow and calm. The Doctor lifted his head; he still a little groggy. He lifted his head long enough to see coming out of the shadows was a man. A tall black man in a dark red suit, a black stripe tie, and black slick shoes. He spoke in a strange accent.
"Doctor Page, its a pleasure. My name is Vlad ShrineBell".
"If this is how you make a first impression, I'd hate to know the second attempted, said the Doctor".
"I'm in no mood for jokes, Doctor".
"You'v been giving my men a hard time, so i'll make this easy for you. Give me the weapon and this will be over".
"I don't know where it is, said Doctor Page".
"The man slammed his hands down on the metal table".
" You made it go into orbit, now tell me its location"!
The Doctor's eyes were red. "When i launched the droid into orbit, the weapon was sent to a random location. It could be anywhere in the world".
"You robbed me of my success, Doctor. Now you'll pay the price".
"Two men came in with a silver box; they placed it on the table".
"Mr. ShrineBell slowly opened the box, revealing a knife".
"Now, I don't like getting my hands dirty, but you gave me no choice, Doctor".
"Mr. ShrineBell slide the knife under the Doctor's fingernail. The doctor yelled in pain, as his nail was cut clean off. Blood dripped from his hand".
"I don't know..."
"You'll talk sooner or later, Doctor Page. "
"Lets just hope your still in one piece when that day comes."
Vlad ShrineBell turned and walked out the room, leaving the Doctor to wallow around in the darkness of his pain, blood, and sorrow.

The author's comments:
I'm not gonna finish this piece, so I just wanted to post it. I don't know if it will get any feedback or comments but i'm hoping.

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This article has 9 comments.

on May. 5 2014 at 10:15 pm
GhostMatrix SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
6 articles 3 photos 82 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live Each Day To The Fullest. -Quote From Somewhere Else-

I'm Whatever You Want Me To Be - My Quote -

Gen is a weapon made for warfare purposes. His DNA and body are able to Resurrect if he gets killed. The scientists want to tweak Gen's DNA and inject it into the soldiers blood-stream. If a soldier dies on the battle-field; he's brought back bigger and stronger than ever.

on Apr. 25 2014 at 10:01 pm
TheLorax BRONZE, Parkland, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The first draft of everything is s***"
-Ernest Hemingway

I think this piece has potential, but many flaws. It lacks a plot and has lots of grammatical errors. It doesn't make much sense, and the characters don't seem to have any sort of common sense whatsoever. All together, this piece needs an awful lot of work, but it could be something good.

on Apr. 25 2014 at 9:43 pm
TheRealUniverse, Nowhere, Other
0 articles 0 photos 10 comments
Firstly I think its a fantastic story.  The quotations need to end after the character end their wording as mentioned in early comments.  Some grammar and punctuation errors, but it is very interesting.  I think you should continue it, but if you don't, just think of all ideas you could use off of it.  I hope to see more writings from you.  Thank you!!!

on Apr. 25 2014 at 12:36 pm
Crystallite BRONZE, Santa Elena, Other
2 articles 2 photos 347 comments
it sounded really good. i just have one question though.what happened to the boy? i got relly hooked to this story :-)

on Apr. 23 2014 at 1:49 pm
Nella.Girl97 BRONZE, Ashland, Wisconsin
1 article 0 photos 437 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Keep on dreaming even if it breaks your heart."

Interesting! But I agree with ThatOneWritingGirl 's comment! Keep writing tho!

Sail_ BRONZE said...
on Apr. 22 2014 at 6:55 pm
Sail_ BRONZE, Eugene, Oregon
3 articles 10 photos 196 comments
This was great! But watch for dialogue, like punctuation and stuff haha

on Apr. 21 2014 at 9:02 pm
ThatOneWritingGirl PLATINUM, Greenwood Village, Colorado
21 articles 0 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon.
Love Always. :)
When the tides of life turn against you and the current upsets your boat, don't waste time and tears on what might have been, just lie on your back and float.

This is great! My only advice would be to play around with sentence structure. Most of the sentences began with "the boy" or "the doctor" or "the [insert word here]" and it got a little repetitive. Great job, though! Keep writing ;)

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Apr. 21 2014 at 7:07 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 631 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green

Really great story, but just keep format and grammar in mind. The dialogue quotations end after a character says their dialogue, they don't go any further. Other than that, you have wonderful imagery and amazing potential for this piece. The last line was my favorite. I think you should continue it for sure :)

on Apr. 21 2014 at 4:17 pm
sillywabbit BRONZE, Federal Way, Washington
2 articles 3 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
Where there is love there is life.
Mahatma Gandhi

wow that was a beautiful story I really anjoyed reading it and it taught me allot thanks Alot ghostB :)