I wish there was someone I could tell everything to, you know?

I want someone there.

I want someone who actually cares about what I feel and think.

I want someone I can be my true self around.

I want someone who I don't have to hide around.

I want someone who I can tell everything that has ever happened to me, and they will actually listen.

I want someone who isn't afraid of what I might say.

I want to have deep conversations with them.

I want this person do do the same with me.

I want to get over my issues, but it is hard when there is nobody there to help.

I want someone who can help. Just by being there.

You always see best friends in the halls, in restaurants, in class, at the mall.

I want that.

How can you get that though, when nobody is willing to let you open up.

Not to mention your own fear of opening up.

I have no idea how people don't know how NOT OK I am.

But then again, I don't let them see.

I want someone to read all of this.

Yet, I never want anyone to see it.

This all reveals how brOKen I actually am.

How scared I am.

How completely nor normal I am.

It reveals all of my thoughts that run through my head daily,

but nobody ever knows.

How can you keep such a big part of you hidden from the world?

How can they not sense the torture that exists within your heart?

How can they not see the gut-wrenching pain in the flicker of your eyes?

How can they not feel the agony, even for a split second, that I feel every day?

How does nobody know?

How does nobody know?

Why does nobody know?

Why do I feel...like everything in life is always falling apart, when so much is still together?

Why do I feel hate towards myself, when it is others making me feel it?

Why do I blame this on others? But then, how is it my fault?

Why can't I just say this to someone?

Why can't I just tell them that I. NEED. HELP.

Who would I talk to?

Where would I start?

How could I start?

What would happen after?

How do I fix me???

I need fixing.

But I can't do it alone.

How can I?

How can I get fixed, when nobody knows that I am even scratched?

How do I do this?

I need help.

please.

help me