Im Happy for You | Teen Ink

Im Happy for You

October 11, 2014
By emmacxoxo PLATINUM, Chelsea, Massachusetts
emmacxoxo PLATINUM, Chelsea, Massachusetts
22 articles 6 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
Okay. Okay.

I got drunk just like you told me to.
I did my hair and makeup, and put on something pretty.
When I got to the party, I laughed and poured myself a drink
And then another one.
And another.
And for a few hours, I believed that I was happy.
You crossed my mind once or twice, but only until I could     find the whiskey again.
I glanced at my phone here and there, and reminded myself your name wouldn’t pop up.
I shuttered as I took a few gulps from the bottle, and then I    forced myself to go back to the party.
I laughed and mingled with my friends, and wished you       were there with me.
But maybe, for a while, you were right.
Maybe for a few hours, I forgot how much I cared.
Maybe I could forget for a while that I would have rather      have been talking to you.
Had been anywhere with you.
Maybe you were right.
But as soon as the lights were turned on, and I walked         home, I knew the truth.
That I was right.
My dark, silent room screamed what my heart had been      beating all along.
That I miss you, and nothing will change that.
That I care about you, and no amount of alcohol can take     that away.
That I need you, and that I cant have you.
So ill go to bed, check my phone one more time and look    up at the stars.
And as the tears fall quietly, hope that you’re looking at those same stars 2,000 miles away. 
And if you’re not, hoping that she makes you as happy as I once did.
Knowing this ill lie about that last one every day until its true
Im happy for you.

The author's comments:

Personal piece written when I was feeling particularly sad regarding someone I love. The feeling of wanting to be happy for that person you care about, and wanting them to believe that you really are happy for them, can often seem more important than your own happiness. I hope others can relate. 

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