Opulence | Teen Ink

Opulence MAG

May 1, 2008
By AquaGem SILVER, Kalamazoo, Michigan
AquaGem SILVER, Kalamazoo, Michigan
5 articles 0 photos 50 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There's just too much fraternizing with the enemy. ~Henry Kissinger

Life it too short to let you matter.


I’ve been watching him for days now. When he leaves his house to go to school, I’m the one carefully tailing him, switching cars every day to make myself look less suspicious. If he ever sneaks out of his second-story room, I’ll be the one silently watching from a nearby tree. In class when he turns, feeling eyes on the back of his head, I’m the one who sent the hair on the back of his neck up on end. I am the girl whose shadow is always slightly overlapping his.

Being assigned to watch him almost makes me
feel like I’m not a stalker. Though I’m only 17, I’m a full-fledged member of the organization known as O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. I’ve been with them since the ­tender age of five. It’s my home. Being an orphan, my office is also my permanent residence, the couch a fold-out bed. There are many others like me: no family. A lot of us are loners and haven’t chosen this route for ourselves.

I’m a tracker. I have been for years and some might say that I am the best at not being the best. In other words, I’m great at being invisible. Or at not being noticed. It’s not as hard as the others in the organization think. Being young and female is good, since most we track are young. Seeing me around younger people – my age, actually – doesn’t raise alarm bells. It helps that I’m cute. With a small frame, light hazel eyes, and short blond hair that curls under my chin, I don’t appear threatening. Of course, my ­organization-funded training doesn’t back that theory.

Soon I won’t be tracking down others with the power. They are finally going to give me an apprentice. After years of mastering everything I’ve been taught, they see my potential. That’s not to say I know everything. Even with my extended life I won’t be able to learn all the things I want to. If only this annoying boy would show the signs. It’s been almost a week. If he doesn’t show soon, they’ll reassign me. That much longer until I get my apprentice.

So here I am, sipping a latté and waiting for the Target to leave for school. I have been put in all of his classes in case something happens there, though I graduated high school years ago. Private tutors sped things up. With no family or personal ties, I had lots of time to devote to my studies. Martial arts black belts. Twelve languages, not including English. Everything a girl needs for a serious career in the agency. Such positions of power are not handed out easily. You must prove yourself many times over.

The Target and I have never spoken, but I know a lot about him. His file told me some, but after watching him for only a few days, I feel confident in saying that I know things no one else does. Not just the obvious, either. He resents his father and is protective of his mother, which makes me suspect the father is less than faithful. He smiles often but doesn’t make a lot of eye contact. He usually only speaks when spoken to. Although he has many friends, he isn’t close with any of them. The Target is observant, a watcher. This leads me to believe we would get along if he shows any promise.

I look down at my watch, then back at his house a few blocks away. The Target is late, which means I’ll be late too. Today my ride is a shiny black sports car, not out of place in this suburb full of midlife-crisis men. I turn on the engine impatiently. I’m fiddling with the radio when I hear something. I don’t feel any immediate danger, and I know to trust those feelings. But I ­also know that something is off.

Just as I am about to get out of the car and pretend to look in the trunk, the passenger door opens. I look up in surprise as the Target slides into the seat next to me. I grin, quite pleased by this turn of events. This is definitely a good sign. Perhaps intuition is strong in him. That would be good for my apprentice to have, complementary. I could handle having to deal with that.

“Hello, Lenna. Why have you been following me for a week now?” the Target asks lightly, conversationally, his first words ever said in my direction.

Ah, one of my many aliases. The organization set it up so that whenever I’m on a case, I get a new name, past, and present. It’s very powerful. The organization can basically do anything it needs; it has people everywhere imaginable. I’m just one of many, though there aren’t that many at the top, as I am. They don’t trust many to be trackers. Or to be apprentices. All of the full members have the power, though we control others to get things done.

My smile deepens as I say in my authoritative, professional voice, “My real name is Jade. I am a witch of the moon and a tracker for the organization known as O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. You are also a witch. We would like to formally welcome you into the organization as my apprentice. Here is my card for verification.”

Jade Wordsworth
Tracker for O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E
Official Political Understanding Lending ­Everyone ­Navigation for Co-Existing Ethereals
Office hours: 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Mon-Sat
Phone: 555-5555
Proud league of witches of the sun and moon.
Worldwide.

“What do you mean ‘moon and sun’? Or ‘tracker’?” he asks, still looking at my card like it’s going to ­disappear.

“Types of magic. Moon is all about spells, the sun is more potion-based, though each type of witchcraft involves the other somehow. As a tracker, I find people like you and I bring them to O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. Every witch must register, train, and become a member by law. In fact, the organization is like a government targeted toward witches,” I explain with a smile, loving the fact that this time I get to teach the newbie.

“Magic? Seriously?” he asks, eyes wide, meeting mine. They are large, yellow, and catlike.

I click a button on my left, automatically locking the doors. I put the car into drive, pulling out onto the road. As an afterthought I add as a courtesy, “I think you had better come with me.” .



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This article has 896 comments.


on Apr. 26 2009 at 8:33 pm
LadyZaza BRONZE, Ouagadougou, Other
1 article 0 photos 3 comments
nice and captivating story :)

not a great fan of witches though this one's a wicked story

on Apr. 26 2009 at 7:41 pm
juliek12 BRONZE, Toronto, Other
1 article 0 photos 1 comment
I loved it! Great work, Victoria! I honestly want you to keep writing this and turn it into a book. It was just so capturing. :)

on Apr. 24 2009 at 9:49 pm
Dnasia Faison BRONZE, Townsend, Delaware
1 article 0 photos 1 comment
OMG!!!! Your story was so non-hooking but I read it anyway hoping ther ewould be a twist but seems there was not heck out my Story The Ghost HOrse and u will see what I mean

csjames GOLD said...
on Apr. 24 2009 at 4:09 pm
csjames GOLD, Cowpens, South Carolina
16 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everyone's a critic, but only you can decide if it affects Y-O-U!!!

It's good! Keep up the good work!

on Apr. 23 2009 at 5:51 pm
carrielynn BRONZE, Pescadero, California
1 article 0 photos 2 comments
this seems like a good start to a longer story, but as a short story i feel like it really needs some more character development to make it more believable. if it was longer there would probably be more room for this. good overall, though

on Apr. 22 2009 at 3:54 pm
October-Izaiah GOLD, Hernando, Mississippi
19 articles 0 photos 1 comment
Dis was crunk

Kerri said...
on Apr. 21 2009 at 9:49 pm
Kerri, East Greenwich, Rhode Island
0 articles 0 photos 17 comments
I like this...took quite a twist at the end. Keep it up ^^

on Apr. 21 2009 at 2:02 am
TJ21992 PLATINUM, Penn Yan, New York
31 articles 1 photo 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"No matter how fast light travels, darkness is always there first, waiting!"

Its a great story but the way you ended so suddenly almost makes it seem as if you are or will make a sequal to contiunue it, will you?

12345 BRONZE said...
on Apr. 20 2009 at 11:58 pm
12345 BRONZE, Strafford, New Hampshire
2 articles 0 photos 27 comments
I'm SO SICK of this article!!! A teenager drinking a latte?! 'Hi, you're a witch,come with me!' I don't ever see this happening, even in a fantasy book, which is pretty much all I read. I commented on this before, and what I said is true: It was well written, but needs work. Not anything to do with your skills as a writer, just... I don't know. It's so serious, and she's a teenager!



P.S. If I ever see that picture of the girl with the luna lovegood earings ever again, I'll jump off a bridge.

LadyLuck GOLD said...
on Apr. 19 2009 at 11:42 pm
LadyLuck GOLD, Cumming, Georgia
14 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wow, I want to know more about jade and the witches! Can there be another one soon?

on Apr. 19 2009 at 9:06 pm
Inkspired PLATINUM, Whitby, Other
26 articles 0 photos 493 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If one will scoff at the study of language, how, save in terms of language, will one scoff?" - Mario Pei
"I write for the same reason I breathe - because if I didn't, I would die." Isaac Asimov

It's got a really good idea, really good beginning, but the ending isn't that great, and really, the guy wouldn't just slide into the car of someone who's been following him, and he wouldn't just ask about the different types of magic, he'd be freaking or laughing his head off. Otherwise, it needs a bit of work but is really great! Make this a book!

on Apr. 18 2009 at 3:28 pm
Miranda Myers BRONZE, Colleyville, Texas
1 article 0 photos 5 comments
wow thats a great story! i absolutly love it!

Mikal SILVER said...
on Apr. 15 2009 at 9:42 pm
Mikal SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 0 photos 41 comments
Check out my poems/songs! This message has been brought to you by Mikal Padellan.

delly BRONZE said...
on Apr. 15 2009 at 9:30 pm
delly BRONZE, CH, New Jersey
3 articles 0 photos 5 comments
thats a great story and idea and its not like any other story about witches i have read u found a unique turn u should defintly write a book from this!!



My first peice and i was hoping for some comments/suggestions and ratings please

TeenInk.com/raw/Fiction/article/96955/Survival-Story-of-A-Seventh-Skunk/

MelindaM GOLD said...
on Apr. 9 2009 at 9:24 pm
MelindaM GOLD, San Diego, California
13 articles 0 photos 4 comments
This story is awesome!!!!

Calina BRONZE said...
on Apr. 9 2009 at 5:50 pm
Calina BRONZE, Forest Park, Georgia
1 article 1 photo 6 comments
This is a wonderful work of literature.

You should really consider in extending it to even a novel. =]

12345 BRONZE said...
on Apr. 9 2009 at 2:17 pm
12345 BRONZE, Strafford, New Hampshire
2 articles 0 photos 27 comments
I liked the story overall. The ending seemed hastily thrown together, but the rest was well written. It was vaguely reminiscent of Eoin Colfer's, Artemis Fowl. Keep writing!

on Apr. 8 2009 at 11:06 pm
aciansgirl BRONZE, Annville, Pennsylvania
2 articles 1 photo 3 comments
i really liked this it was very good i love vampire witches and soo on books this was great write on

on Apr. 8 2009 at 3:07 pm
MusicL0v3r28 GOLD, Forks, Pennsylvania
11 articles 0 photos 12 comments
This is amazing!:)

on Apr. 4 2009 at 8:52 pm
Alex(andra)_12 BRONZE, Mexia, Texas
1 article 2 photos 5 comments
Very nice. Sounds like my kind of book.