Breakup Advice | Teen Ink

Breakup Advice

September 24, 2009
By Anonymous

After those amazing relationships end, you have to ask yourself how things will continue. If you broke up with your partner, you must either be unhappy with them, mad at them, tired of them, or some other circumstance. So, if it is you who breaks up with the other, stop and think. As one single person, you don't have any idea what the other might go through. One moment to you is completely different that that of another. For example, you might go on a date and have the time of your life, oblivious to that fact that the one you care for is about to slit their wrists in boredom.
Just and example.
But that is something that you can relate to a breakup. You might think that things are better off without the other. They might be tripping and falling behind you, trying to catch up and get you back. It happens a lot, and these breakups are the worst. I myself went through one. And I've scraped my knees so much over these past to years tripping and falling after her(yes, two years. She's so beautiful I can't stop thinking about her). I've found out the the first and most important thing you can do to stay out of those horrible, bad break ups, is to forget. Easier said then done, right? Well, there is only one way to completely get over such a thing. Overwrite the memories that the two of you shared. Now, people call this a rebound, but isn't every boyfriend/girlfriend after the first a rebound? You must make better memories with this person. Have a greater time, and think about the new things you share rather then all the things you used to share with the other. Take it from me, with time, almost everything is mendable.


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This article has 471 comments.


on Oct. 7 2009 at 10:29 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

hmm now with that, like i've said, you've got to find someone better to override those old memories. In our lovely social society as it is today, people don't like it when others "rebound". But most people are oblivious to it being a rebound if you have the confindence and tell them even if it is or is not true, that you have gotten over them and are moving on to greener pastures

on Oct. 7 2009 at 4:19 pm
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

yeah. i know. and i do voice my opinions. now anyway. and i hated him yelling at me, and i told him that too but some guys are just unstoppable. so i am rapidly tryin to get over it and move on as fast as i can.

on Oct. 7 2009 at 1:52 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

Well, idc who you are, you have to stand up for yourself. If he just pushed you around, i wouldn't think that that would be a worthy relationship. you may like that, but if i was you, i'd want my opinions to be heard and care about the others opinion. and i wouldn't want anybody YELLING at me either...

on Oct. 7 2009 at 11:52 am
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

i told him everything. his reason for us breaking up this time was that i was phony. the only reason i seemed that way was because my friend was right there wen he was yelling at me once and i stood up to him. then he broke up with me. i never stand up to him. that is why i seemed phony. but at the same time when i later explained that to him, he still didnt cut me abreak. so,, here i am still loving him, and him still hating me...

on Oct. 6 2009 at 11:01 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

well, idk, try to losen up and "go with the flow". that may be the only time i ever say that. I practically hate that phrase, but it seems appropriate

on Oct. 6 2009 at 10:59 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

Yea, Kira, i've had the whole silence thing happen to me. The "love" of my early life broke up with me after almost a year and she never gave me a reason why until like, 3 or so months later. Those 3 months were very, very hard.

on Oct. 6 2009 at 8:20 pm
KiraKira PLATINUM, Cardiff By The Sea, California
35 articles 0 photos 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, pity those who live without love -Albus Dumbledore

Lying does hit you hard. Silence, however, is worse because you never get what really happened.

on Oct. 6 2009 at 7:39 pm
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

well, to answer both of you, he didnt say i love you until about 3 months after we started going out. my friends loved him, and he bought us things like chips when we were out (including my friends) but in the end it turned out to be lies. you would have to know all the gory details to really understand, but that is basically the point. i trusted him. i loved him back. but the original and all the other i love you's and words he told me were lies. i meant my words because of what i felt, not wat he said but...at the same time i could have gotten over him if he had just not said it at all if he didnt mean it. i have like 9 poems getting reviewed and they really tell the story. check them out once they get accepted :)

on Oct. 6 2009 at 5:46 pm
KiraKira PLATINUM, Cardiff By The Sea, California
35 articles 0 photos 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, pity those who live without love -Albus Dumbledore

I agree with Sam O., and maybe the best thing for you is just be friends. But be careful, and don't be too abrupt. Like don't one minute confess your love for the guy then sudeenly say can we just be friends. It will never work.

on Oct. 6 2009 at 5:42 pm
KiraKira PLATINUM, Cardiff By The Sea, California
35 articles 0 photos 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, pity those who live without love -Albus Dumbledore

What you might also want to consider if you or your friends actually want to be around the guy. Also, words are meaningless if it doesn't come from the heart. Trust me, I know what it's like to say something and not entirely mean it at all.

on Oct. 6 2009 at 5:38 pm
KiraKira PLATINUM, Cardiff By The Sea, California
35 articles 0 photos 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, pity those who live without love -Albus Dumbledore

Let me rephrase that: the guys at my school are immature. I now find I have a difficulty with trudting people. I'm also a bit more tempremental these days, so fewer people actually talk to me.

on Oct. 6 2009 at 2:21 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

and the article hasn't been edited by the editors yet so give it some time lol. sorry about the wait

on Oct. 6 2009 at 2:18 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

oh man. where do i begin on the word "love"? haha. At the moment i'm pending a response from the editors on an article i just recently wrote called "Pardon?". It envolves the same discussion and when it is done being edited, i'd check it out and write your opinions back to me. Personally, the strength of love only depends on the circumstances upon which it was obtained. What i mean by that is, if like, you've been dating for a week and the guy tells you he loves you, i'd say that he hasn't been thinking things through and is jumping to conclusions. Usually. There is a certain, love at "First sight" but i found it's more of a love at "first convo". It's that sudden realization that someone else out there is exactly like you and/or completes you (whatever you prefer). So, to cut to the point, i'd say you'd have to tell me your story before i can give you any more advice on the "love" cituation. :)

on Oct. 6 2009 at 12:20 pm
KaraTaylor DIAMOND, Neptune, New Jersey
81 articles 17 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments"

"experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."

"be as you wish to seem."

"it's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not."

okay. so this is totally amazing advice. it is so very true. but like you said, it is easier said than being done. even if the guy or yourself is a complete jerk, well... either way if the word love is involved it just makes it all the more harder whether it was a lie or straight up. maybe some advice on that???

on Oct. 5 2009 at 2:11 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

i'm a man myself little miss! haha. I'm quite serious and still playful for my age, thank you very much haha. But i know what it's like to have a "talkative" best friend. I've learned to confide my secrets elsewhere. You must find that one friend that you can trust. and if you don't have a friend like that, make a new one :D

on Oct. 4 2009 at 11:30 pm
KiraKira PLATINUM, Cardiff By The Sea, California
35 articles 0 photos 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, pity those who live without love -Albus Dumbledore

Well, what if you don't trust your friends because they have fairly big mouths, if you know what I mean. And hey, we're teenagers. Of course the guys are going to be immature.

on Oct. 4 2009 at 7:46 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

That would be something you and him have to talk about. Through close, emotional conversations you will most likely be able to work out what he wants, and he will know what you want. Don't be encouraged to jump on the bandwagon with "you guys really should date" thing. Although they are your friends, they don't know you as well as you do. And only YOU, knows whats best for YOU. Just talk to him about it. Second chances are hard to come by, and a third is almost legendary. My advice is just talk to him about it. Don't be secerative or sublimanal, be frank and to the point. After all, you don't want to get the wrong idea! haha. tell me if this helps any :)

on Oct. 4 2009 at 7:40 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

Well, then you will just have to put your trust in that of your friends. They're your best hand in the game. Put your faith in them until someone else shows themselves to be mature enough to be in a relationship with you. And just wondering, if all of your guy-friends are immature, how old are you? lol

on Oct. 4 2009 at 7:36 pm
White_Shadow BRONZE, Putnam, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A life without cause is a life without effect." - Unknown

That'll do too haha thanks

on Oct. 4 2009 at 2:20 pm
NeverSayNever GOLD, Lumby, Other
12 articles 1 photo 34 comments
Ummm well my story is a little random...Two years ago I met this guy. And I had actually met him in grade 6, kinda. I thought he was a cutie, but I knew that I would probably never see him again. Then I go into highschool and look what happens, he turns out to go to the school too. We soon become best friends, but my other friend liked him, and unforntunly for me he liked her back. In the end of the first semester they finally stopped liking eachother, which ment I had a chance. Time passed and by the end of the school year we both really liked eachother. So I asked him out (not very tradiotal) and over the summer I talked to him everyday on the phone (I only actually saw him 2x). Anyways I decided maybe we should just be friends and ended it...then some things happened and I think I reliazed that I shouldn't have broke up with him. But instead of trying to fix things, I got mad and acted like a total jerkfor 4 months. After awhile I finally decided how foolish I had been. It started with apoligizing in emails, then we hanged out at school, soon we became best friends again. But then we started liking eachother...but we both agree that we are better as friends. Even though everyone is telling us to go out again. And the worst part is that I really do want to take the chance, yet I'm too afriad of falling and he won't catch me. ow I think i'm being selfish when I had the chance and I'm not taking it. Second chances are few, and now I'm letting it pass me by. And I know that he wants to take the chance, but I don't know if it's because of me that he isn't or if he is also afriad...